From: Nichael Cramer (nichael@sover.net)
Date: Tue Jan 27 1998 - 20:53:46 EST
I suspect that most folks here know one or another of the many versions of
the old shaggy dog story whose punchline is "... Teeth will be provided!"
[NOTE*]
Fewer, however, I suspect are familar with an article (published in
Catholic Biblical Quarterly, 12 (1950), 439-49) which purports to
establish a textual witness for this story... [NOTE**]
Under the title "An Amusing Agraphon", a P. R. Coleman-Norton tells of
being stationed in Morroco during WWII. In brief, one day, at a nearby
mosque, he reports that he chanced upon a manuscript containing a portion
of a:
...Greek translation of the Latin OPUS IMPERFECTUM IN
MATHEAEUM, which is a collection of fifty-four homilies
constructed in the form of a commentary on St. Matthew's
Gospel (chapters 1-13 and 19-25), once ascribed to the
authorship of St. John Chrysostom [...] but now commonly
considered anonymous ..." [p440f]
Again summarizing, the manuscript is reported to contain an insertion
between Mt 24:51 and 25:1. Coleman-Norton continues:
Then appears the agraphon with this introduction, which to
all indications seems to be scriptural:
KAI IDOU, TIS TWN MA(QHT)WN AUTOU EFESTOTWN AUTWi
ELEGEN. 'RABBI, hO LEGETAI ME(QER)MHNEUOMENON DIDASKALE
PWS DUNHSETAI TAUTA GENES(QAI), EAN WSIN ANODONTES;
APOKRIQEIS DE hO IHSOUS EIPEN. OLIGOPISTE, MH SKULLOU. EI
ARA TINWN hUSTERHSONTAI, hOI ODONTES PROSPARASKEUASONTAI.
[NOTE***]
Which is accompanied by a footnote reading:
This may be translated thus: "And behold, a certain one of
his disciples standing by said unto him: 'Rabbi (which is
to say, being interpretted, Master), how can these things
be, if they be toothless?' And Jesus answered and said:
'O thou of little faith, trouble not thyself; if haply
they will be lacking any, teeth will be provided.'" [p443]
While I think it is safe to say that it is not unreasonable to expect that
this all be taken with a not particularly small grain of salt, I offer it
here in hopes that some may find it, if not as interesting as adultery, at
least amusing or perhaps --with the season for oral Doctoral defenses soon
to be upon us-- useful.
Nichael
[NOTE* A much-abridged version:
The old-timey minister is in the pulpit, raining
fire-and-brimstone down on his audience. His text is
Matthew's "There will be wailing and gnashing of teeth".
From the back of the room a smart-alecky voice asks: "But
Rev'r'nd --what if a man ain't got no teeth?" The
minister thunders: "Teeth will be provided!" ]
[NOTE** OTOH, maybe _I'm_ the only one here who's never seen
this article before. ;-) ]
[NOTE*** Please forgive my transliteration; I am typing
this while away from my usual office.]
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