REFUGEE FROM ROSWELL
By Charles Deemer
FADE IN:
EXT. OUTDOOR CAFE - DAY
People fill tables at an outdoor cafe in the city on a
beautiful spring afternoon.
At a table sit JOE and TRICIA, a handsome couple in their
20s. Tricia wears a designer jogging outfit; Joe is dressed
casually in slacks and sportcoat.
Tricia is visibly agitated, while Joe sits calmly, sipping an
espresso.
TRICIA
I can't believe you're doing this -
especially now. We were going to
Washington next week.
JOE
We can still do that.
TRICIA
What's the point? A final fling
before you leave?
JOE
I told you six months ago I'd
probably be moving.
TRICIA
I thought you'd change your mind
since everything's been so good. Or
so I thought.
Several tables away, watching the couple closely, sit HELEN,
60s, and AMY, 40s.
HELEN
I bet he's telling her that he told
her six months ago he'd be leaving.
That's what he told me.
AMY
And to pay closer attention.
At the other table:
JOE
You have to pay closer attention to
what I'm really saying, not what you
want to hear. I've never lied to
you, Tricia.
TRICIA
I just can't believe you can do this
so goddamn easily!
She gets up from the table, throwing down her napkin.
Watching the scene:
HELEN
"I've never lied to you." I bet
that's the line that gets her.
AMY
That line was the last straw for me,
too.
At the table, Joe gets to his feet while Tricia is moving
off. He MOUTHS the very words that Helen is expecting and
repeating to Amy.
HELEN (O.S.)
"I never lied to you!"
Then he calls after her:
JOE
Tricia!
He sits back down, looking more resigned to the inevitable
than upset.
At the other table, Amy leans forward to confide something,
as Tricia stomps by the women's table in a huff.
AMY
It was summer, in 1976, the
Bicentennial. I can remember it like
it was yesterday. I loved that man
so much. I was only 19.
HELEN
Spring of '55 for me, dear. But we
don't want to lose her, do we?
Helen gets up, Amy quickly behind her, and they take off
after Tricia.
Also overlooking this scene from another table has been
GEORGE, 30s, who now moves to sit down across the table from
Joe.
GEORGE
I bring you greetings from home.
He makes an unusual gesture with his hands, like sign
language, and a LIGHT GLOWS in the palm of his hand.
Joe's eyes widen.
JOE
You're . . . ?
George nods, yes.
GEORGE
Don't react. Do you have a domicile
where we can talk?
JOE
Of course. They call it an apartment
here.
George takes a small foreign language dictionary out of his
coat pocket.
GEORGE
Apartment? I don't recall learning
the word.
JOE
It's only a few blocks from here.
EXT. CITY - STREET - DAY
Helen and Amy catch up with Tricia on the city street.
HELEN
Excuse me.
TRICIA
Yes?
HELEN
We'd like to talk to you.
AMY
We couldn't help but see the fight
you had with your boyfriend.
TRICIA
What are you, spying on me?
AMY
For weeks now.
TRICIA
You're not serious.
AMY
"I've always told you my plans."
HELEN
"You have to listen to what I'm
saying, not what you want to hear."
AMY
"I've never lied to you."
These last three lines have a visible affect on Tricia, who
looks like she needs to sit down.
TRICIA
Who the hell are you?
HELEN
Your predecessors.
TRICIA
What's that supposed to mean?
AMY
He dumped us, too, dear. Me in the
70s, Helen in the 50s.
HELEN
You look like you need to sit down.
INT. JOE'S APT - DAY
George is looking around Joe's apartment with great
curiosity. The small one-bedroom is tastefully decorated
without being ostentatious, in a somewhat bohemian style.
George finds a basket of laundry with a bra on top. He picks
it up, as if he were lifting the specimen of a snake.
GEORGE
You live alone?
Joe ignores the question.
JOE
Maybe we should do this somewhere
else.
GEORGE
Do what?
The question takes Joe by surprise.
JOE
Wait a minute. I thought you were--
GEORGE
I am.
JOE
Then you're here for my report,
aren't you?
George looks at him like a General looking at an enlisted man.
GEORGE
I could have let you send your
report, as always.
JOE
Then why are you here?
GEORGE
To see for myself.
JOE
See what?
George flips Joe a superior smile.
GEORGE
So many obvious questions. Is this
the style of the natives you've
adapted? Now you have me doing it.
What do I call you anyway?
JOE
Joe.
GEORGE
This body was named George.
JOE
If you're not here to get my report,
then what are you here for?
GEORGE
Joe, I'm here to see for myself.
You've had some extraordinary things
to say about the natives here. I
want to make sure your reports are
accurate.
INT. COCKTAIL LOUNGE - DAY
Tricia sips her drink, takes a deep breath and prepares to
speak.
TRICIA
Let me see if I have this straight.
You lived with Joe for several years
in the 1950s--
HELEN
Correct.
TRICIA
--and you did the same thing in the
70s.
AMY
I was very much in love with him.
Just like you.
HELEN
And like I was.
TRICIA
You sit there with a straight face
and tell me this. I don't get it.
HELEN
Don't get what, dear?
TRICIA
Joe wasn't even born in the 1950s -
and was just a child in the 70s. Now
what's this really about?
Amy turns to Helen, deferring to the older woman to continue.
HELEN
You don't understand. The man
doesn't age. We believe he's, well,
not from here.
TRICIA
I already know that. He was a Navy
brat. Born in Norfolk and attended
a dozen schools before he reached
high school.
HELEN
We believe he's from another planet.
Tricia isn't sure what to make of this. Finally she has to
laugh.
AMY
He has an incision scar inside his
right thigh.
HELEN
Another on his left buttock.
Tricia's expression tells us they are right.
TRICIA
Do you have some specific planet in
mind?
HELEN
We think he survived the flying
saucer crash at Roswell.
AMY
The summer of 1947, dear. Long
before you were born.
HELEN
He's a refugee from Roswell.
Tricia is speechless.
EXT. JOE'S APT - DAY
George follows Joe out of the apartment. A DOORMAN, 60s,
greets him.
DOORMAN
Good morning.
Joe ignores him. He is in a huff, moving quickly down the
sidewalk, with George right on his heels.
JOE
I deserve medals, not censor.
GEORGE
Why are you angry? You're acting
like a native.
JOE
Who has done better research than me?
GEORGE
I believe the correct grammar is I.
JOE
Nobody here says I. It's a giveaway.
GEORGE
They don't follow their own rules of
grammar?
JOE
I've been sending you invaluable data
about these people for fifty years.
GEORGE
I'm not criticizing you. I just want
to see for myself before the
committee arrives.
Joe finally stops walking. He turns and confronts George.
JOE
What committee?
George ignores the question.
GEORGE
How about the grand tour? We could
start with this children's game
played by millionaires. Basket . . .?
JOE
Basketball. What committee?
GEORGE
Basketball, yes. A children's game,
you wrote, in which they throw a ball
through a hoop - and according to
your reports, for this they get
rewarded far beyond the reward given
to teachers or nurses or parents. We
sure got a laugh out of that! And
you wonder why I'm here?
JOE
Yes, that's the way it is. I can
prove it to you.
GEORGE
I hope so! I'm on your side here.
I want the committee to see that
everything you've reported is true.
My plan depends on it.
JOE
What plan? What committee?
INT. COCKTAIL LOUNGE - DAY
Helen and Amy both hand photographs to Tricia.
HELEN
We realize how hard this must be for
you to understand.
AMY
I was just as disbelieving at first.
Tricia looks at the FIRST PHOTOGRAPH:
it shows Joe, physically looking exactly as he looks today,
posed informally with Helen as a young woman, whose peddle
pushers and hair style date the era as the fifties.
In the SECOND PHOTOGRAPH, Amy is sitting on the lap of Joe,
again who looks the same, at a party. A backdrop banner
reads "Happy Bicentennial 1976!!"
Tricia tosses down the photographs.
TRICIA
You made these with a computer.
EXT. COCKTAIL LOUNGE - DAY
Tricia comes out of the bar, moving quickly down the street.
Helen and Amy come out behind her. They watch her go.
AMY
She doesn't believe us.
HELEN
Would you have?
AMY
No. What now?
HELEN
We count on her curiosity.
INT. PUBLIC LIBRARY - RESEARCH AREA - DAY
Tricia sits at a microfilm machine in the public library.
She brings up a headline about the flying saucer crash in
Roswell, New Mexico. It's the July 8, 1947, edition of the
newspaper.
The headline reads: "Roswell Army Airfield Captures Flying
Saucer On Ranch".
INT. PUBLIC LIBRARY - CHECK OUT DESK - DAY
Tricia is checking out a book about the Roswell incident.
CHECK OUT CLERK
I read this. You'll love it. Did
you see the alien autopsy on
television?
TRICIA
The alien autopsy?
CHECK OUT CLERK
The government filmed it. They've
been covering it up for years.
INT. GYM - POOL - DAY
Tricia stands on a diving board, ready to dive into a pool.
Poolside is her coach, BI JINGJING, a middle-aged Chinese
woman.
BI JINGJING
Reverse somersault tuck.
Tricia takes a deep breath and dives: she over-extends her
rotation, a very poor dive.
She swims to the edge of the pool and climbs out.
BI JINGJING
Where is your mind today?
TRICIA
Joe's moving to Seattle. We're
splitting up.
BI JINGJING
I'm sorry.
TRICIA
Me, too.
BI JINGJING
Do you want to call it quits for the
day? I'm not focusing too well
myself. I think I'm nervous about
meeting the President.
TRICIA
No! I want to dive.
She goes to the board for another dive. She takes a deep
breath, trying to get her concentration back.
BI JINGJING
Again: reverse somersault tuck.
Tricia dives - better but by no means up to her usual
standard. Bi's face tells us this.
INT. SUSAN'S APT - NIGHT
Tricia's girlfriend, SUSAN, 20s, opens the door to find
Tricia standing there. The look on Tricia's face tells Susan
everything.
SUSAN
Oh my God. It finally happened.
Tricia breaks into tears.
INT. SUSAN'S APT - WET BAR - NIGHT
Tricia and Susan sit at a wet bar, drinking coffee.
SUSAN
I think I have an explanation.
Mental hospital refugees.
TRICIA
That's too easy.
SUSAN
Every time you pick up the paper,
some mental ward is closing. They
just dump these people on the streets.
TRICIA
They went to all the trouble to make
the photographs. And where did they
get a picture of Joe to work with?
How did they know about the scars?
SUSAN
You've convinced me. He's a Martian.
That's why he always looks so damn
good. He doesn't age, they're right
about that. He hasn't aged a day in
the three years I've known him.
TRICIA
They're crazy, or he's an alien.
Great choice we have here.
SUSAN
I guess you're just going to have to
ask him.
TRICIA
Maybe he put them up to it. Some
weird idea to make it easier on me.
He's moving to Seattle.
SUSAN
Oh, Trish . . .
TRICIA
Just what I need right now.
SUSAN
How could he, with the trials coming
up? Wasn't he going to Washington
with you?
TRICIA
We were going to see Bi get her
award, and then he'd stay for the
trials. But the thing is, I had my
own surprise - I was going to tell
him this was my last meet, I was
retiring from competition so I could
. . .
She is fighting to hold back the tears.
TRICIA
I'm pregnant.
Susan moves to put her arms around Tricia, and Tricia finally
lets the tears come.
EXT. JOE'S APT - DAY
Tricia's car pulls into the lot and parks. She gets out and
heads for the apartment building.
DOORMAN
And how are you this lovely day?
TRICIA
I've been better, Mr. Wells.
DOORMAN
At least you have your youth!
Tricia hurries inside, ignoring the remark.
INT. JOE'S APT - DAY
The door opens and Tricia steps inside.
TRICIA
Joe? It's me!
She finds a blanket on the divan, evidence that someone slept
there last night. She looks surprised.
She goes to the bedroom and peeks inside. The room is empty,
the bed unmade.
She goes to the closet and starts taking out her clothes.
INT. OUTDOOR CAFE - DAY
Joe and George are at the outdoor cafe, having coffee.
George makes a face after a sip.
GEORGE
How long did it take you to get used
to this?
JOE
I liked it immediately.
George makes a face.
GEORGE
You do have an affinity. So what's in
store for today?
JOE
Nothing until you tell me what's
going on.
GEORGE
I want to see these millionaires who
play children's games.
JOE
I want to know about the committee.
GEORGE
The committee has to make the final
approval of the plan. If what you've
sent us is true, there's no question
that they will.
JOE
Approval for what?
GEORGE
Making this a destination planet. If
the natives are as primitive as you
report, it's perfect.
JOE
I'm not sure I understand.
George is thumbing through his dictionary.
GEORGE
I saw the word for it this morning.
Turning this planet into . . . here
it is: a zoo, a planetary zoo.
Where civilized people can come to
visit and marvel at the exotic habits
of the primitive natives.
JOE
You want to turn Earth into a zoo?
GEORGE
They have zoos for monkeys - and
we'll have zoos for them! Every
species in its rightful place.
George grins.
INT. JOE'S APT - DAY
Tricia brings two suitcases into the living room from the
bedroom, setting them onto the floor.
She goes to a small desk and prepares to write Joe a note.
As she's thinking how to begin, the door opens, and Joe and
George step in.
Tricia gets quickly to her feet.
TRICIA
I was just writing you a note. I'll
be staying with Susan for a while.
I don't want to get in the way while
you're packing.
When Joe doesn't reply, she thrusts her hand forward at
George.
TRICIA
I don't think we've met. I'm Tricia.
JOE
I'm sorry, this is-- . . .
GEORGE
George.
JOE
George! Meet Tricia; Tricia, George.
There's an awkward silence.
TRICIA
Can we speak in the hallway a minute?
She picks up the suitcases.
JOE
Let me help you with that.
TRICIA
I can manage.
She takes the bags into the hallway. Joe gives a shrug to
George and follows her.
INT. JOE'S APT - HALLWAY - DAY
Tricia sets down the heavy suitcases again.
TRICIA
I want to ask you something.
JOE
Anything.
TRICIA
Joe, are you-- . . .
JOE
Am I what?
Tricia frowns, the question suddenly too absurd for her to
ask.
TRICIA
Are you comfortable with me going to
Susan's?
JOE
Seems like the logical place to go.
She's your best friend.
TRICIA
The logical place to go. Great.
She picks up the suitcases and storms off. Joe calls after
her:
JOE
Tricia!
George steps into the hallway.
GEORGE
To an outsider, the natives have a
very primitive emotional life.
JOE
Tell me about it.
INT. SUSAN'S APT - NIGHT
Tricia is stretched out on the divan, reading the Roswell
book, when Susan enters.
SUSAN
Sorry I'm late. Did you manage
dinner for yourself?
TRICIA
No problem.
Susan stands over Tricia, waiting for her to go on.
SUSAN
Well? Did Joe call?
Tricia shakes her head and continues to read.
SUSAN
Are you going to tell him?
Tricia ignores the question.
SUSAN
How's the book?
TRICIA
Fascinating.
SUSAN
So is he an alien?
Tricia gives her a dirty look.
SUSAN
If he is, Trish, what about the baby?
TRICIA
What about it?
SUSAN
It might not be . . . ?
TRICIA
Human.
SUSAN
Well, yes. Have you thought about
that?
Tricia slams her book down and gets up.
TRICIA
Of course I've thought about it!
I've thought about nothing else.
Tricia is shaking, and Susan steps forward to embrace her.
Tricia melts in her arms, crying.
INT. HEALTH CLUB - TRICIA'S OFFICE - DAY
Tricia, dressed casually, comes into her office at a health
club, moving past the SECRETARY, a woman in her 40s.
SECRETARY
Your mother's waiting for you.
This stops Tricia.
TRICIA
My mother's dead.
SECRETARY
Oh dear . . .
The secretary stands up from her desk.
TRICIA
I'll take care of it.
Tricia walks into her office to find Helen seated across the
desk.
TRICIA
If you don't leave voluntarily, I'm
calling security.
She's stopped by an old newspaper on her desk. The headline
reads: "Flying Saucer Crashes On Roswell Ranch".
HELEN
Turn to page five.
Tricia starts to say something but doesn't. She turns to
page five - and immediately she gasps.
She's looking down at a PHOTO OF JOE in the 1947 Roswell
newspaper, looking exactly as he looks today. A headline
describes the young man's death in an automobile accident.
HELEN
The young man died in a car crash in
Roswell the same day as the flying
saucer crash.
TRICIA
And you're claiming that . . . ?
HELEN
Joe survived the crash and took over
the young man's body, and he hasn't
aged a day since then.
Tricia thinks a moment, then buzzes her secretary on the
intercom.
TRICIA
Cancel my appointments. I'll be tied
up the rest of the day.
INT. HOTEL - ROOM - DAY
Tricia sits at a table in a hotel suite, going through a
scrapbook showing scenes of Joe with Helen or Amy through the
years.
There's a knock on the door. Amy goes to answer it.
HELEN
There's someone we want you to meet.
Amy brings BRAD MCCALL, 30s, into the room. Mccall is an
investigative reporter.
BRAD
You must be the latest. Brad Mccall.
He offers his hand. Tricia just stares at him.
HELEN
She still has doubts.
BRAD
Who can blame her? Miss . . .?
TRICIA
Who are you?
BRAD
I write for Time Magazine, and I was
a skeptic for months. But not any
more.
TRICIA
What do you people want from me?
AMY
Your help in stopping him from going
on with this.
TRICIA
Going on with what?
HELEN
Whatever it is he's up to, dear.
BRAD
I'd like your cooperation. This is
the story of the century. Of any
century.
TRICIA
I think I should talk to Joe first.
HELEN
He moved this morning.
TRICIA
He wouldn't leave without saying
goodbye.
HELEN
He has to move every four or five
years or people will notice he never
ages.
TRICIA
He can't have moved already.
INT. JOE'S APT - DAY
Tricia is walking through Joe's apartment as Helen, Amy and
Brad watch. Only Tricia's things that she left behind
remain, Joe having packed and gone.
Finally Tricia accepts that Joe has, in fact, moved out.
TRICIA
What can I do to help?
INT. GYM - POOL - DAY
Tricia springs off the board, doing a front dive with a half
twist pike. Not bad.
She gets out of the pool, where her coach is waiting for her.
BI JINGJING
Much better today.
TRICIA
I have to go to Seattle for a few
days.
BI JINGJING
Really? Do you think you can afford
a break in training?
TRICIA
I don't have a choice.
BI JINGJING
The trials are only-- . . .
TRICIA
I know when they are! I'm sorry.
BI JINGJING
You're seeing Joe in Seattle?
TRICIA
Yes.
BI JINGJING
Bad timing.
TRICIA
I know. I'll try to dive every day
while I'm there.
BI JINGJING
You still plan to come early to
Washington?
TRICIA
I wouldn't miss it for the world.
I'll be there - with or without Joe.
INT. HILTON - SUITE - NIGHT
Joe and George are sharing a suite at the Hilton in Seattle.
Joe is combing his hair at the mirror. George sits at a
table, reading over something. He reads aloud:
GEORGE
Here it is: "Earthlings who play
sports professionally earn millions
of dollars, much more than teachers,
nurses, social workers, police,
fireman, parents, or many others who
contribute essential work to the
society. Here Leisure and Escape are
more important than Education and
Social Welfare." The committee got
a good laugh from that. Then I
thought, if this is actually true,
what a fantastic opportunity for a
vacation retreat! Primitive life
forms are so fascinating.
JOE
I don't like the idea of turning this
planet into a zoo. These people are
more complex than you think.
GEORGE
That's why you're the scientist, and
I'm the businessman, isn't it?
INT. BASKETBALL ARENA - NIGHT
A professional basketball game is in progress, the Seattle
Sonics at home.
INT. ARENA - STANDS - NIGHT
Joe and George sit in the stands, watching the game. Joe has
become something of a fan, but George is totally bewildered.
George looks around the stands in amazement, never having
seen anything like this before.
Joe notices his disbelief.
JOE
You'll get used to it.
GEORGE
Who ARE these people? This is
wonderful!
INT. RESTAURANT - NIGHT
Joe and George are having pie and coffee after the game.
George inspects every bite, as if he were eating sweetened
insects.
GEORGE
These basketball players and teachers
you interviewed - can I talk to them?
JOE
Of course. They'll tell you the same
thing they told me.
GEORGE
And they talk to you openly?
JOE
Once they trust me. I tell them I'm
writing a book.
INT. JOE'S APT - DAY
Susan is watching Tricia pack.
SUSAN
Even if it's true, following him to
Seattle is dangerous. He could zap
you into a pile of ashes.
TRICIA
This isn't Star Trek.
SUSAN
Then what is it?
TRICIA
I don't know. But something is - I
don't even know the word for it.
Very strange.
SUSAN
This stuff scares the bejesus out of
me, Trish. Why can't you just drop
it?
TRICIA
Because I love him. And I don't
believe he would hurt me. No matter
where he's from.
INT. SCHOOL - DAY
Joe and George wait outside a classroom. The bell rings, and
students pour out. Many are dressed in the wild attire of
the times, which George looks at with wide-eyed amazement.
TOM BRADLEY, 30s, a teacher, steps out into the hallway.
TOM
I only have twenty minutes.
INT. SCHOOL - FACULTY LUNCH ROOM - DAY
Joe and George sit with Tom at a corner table in the faculty
lunchroom.
TOM
George, as I told Joe earlier, the
way I figure it, in this society,
where we are free to choose, we get
exactly the kind of culture we
deserve. If the American people
think that watching a bunch of seven-
foot freaks, with mediocre educations
at best, is more important than
giving the men and women who educate
their children a living wage - well,
what can I say? You get the society
you deserve. So here we are. It's
the pits, isn't it?
George just looks at him.
TOM
That's just my opinion, of course.
EXT. OUTDOOR CAFE - DAY
Joe and George are having espresso. George still isn't sure
whether he likes it or not.
GEORGE
This is extraordinary. Evolution has
proven that the care and education of
the children are the foundation of
species stability - and look what
they do. If we left them to their
own devices, they'd be extinct within
a century.
Joe doesn't look pleased as his line of thought.
GEORGE
We'll be doing them a favor.
INT. AIRPORT - SEATTLE - DAY
Tricia walks through the airport.
EXT. AIRPORT - SEATTLE - DAY
She comes out and hails a cab.
INT. ROOSEVELT HOTEL - ROOM - DAY
Tricia is on the phone with Susan.
Intercut phone conversation:
TRICIA
He's staying at the Hilton.
SUSAN
Now there's a needle in a haystack.
TRICIA
He's been doing research for his book
in Seattle and always stays at the
Hilton. He's a creature of habit.
SUSAN
Please don't use the word "creature."
And be careful!
EXT. SEATTLE STREETS - NIGHT
A police car moves down a city street.
INT. POLICE CAR - NIGHT
Sitting in back are Joe and George. Two POLICEMEN sit up
front.
POLICEMAN DRIVING
So how's the book coming?
JOE
Oh, it's coming right along. I was
telling my assistant here what you
told me earlier about how many guns
are on the street.
The policeman in the passenger seat turns back to them.
OTHER POLICEMAN
There are more goddamn guns than
people out there.
GEORGE
More guns than people? Surely that's
an exaggeration.
OTHER POLICEMAN
Believe it.
Suddenly a CALL comes over the radio. The driver swerves to
the curb.
POLICEMAN DRIVING
I don't think you want to be a part
of this.
Joe and George get out.
EXT. SEATTLE STREETS - NIGHT
They watch the police car speed away.
GEORGE
More guns than people?
JOE
And their policemen don't get paid
any more than their teachers do.
GEORGE
Extraordinary. The committee will
love this.
EXT. HILTON - NIGHT
A cab pulls in front of the Hilton, and Joe and George get
out.
GEORGE
I have some business to take care of.
What you've shown me is perfect. I'm
recommending you for an accommodation.
JOE
You have your key?
GEORGE
Yes. But I don't need a key, and
neither do you.
George starts wandering off down the street.
JOE
You do if you want to keep your
cover. Goodnight.
INT. HILTON - SUITE - NIGHT
Joe opens the door and comes in. He turns on the light.
Tricia is sitting in a chair, waiting for him.
JOE
How did you find me?
TRICIA
It wasn't very hard.
Tricia gets up, fetches a newspaper that is sitting on the
table, and approaches Joe.
TRICIA
The bellboy let me in. I said I was
your wife.
She hands him the paper.
The paper is turned to the 1947 PHOTO OF "JOE" after the
automobile accident. Joe looks at it without reacting.
JOE
Where did you get this?
TRICIA
You'd be surprised.
Tricia's voice breaks. This isn't easy for her.
JOE
This guy looks a lot like me.
TRICIA
He looks exactly like you, Joe. Why
didn't you tell me about Helen and
Amy?
Joe clears his throat.
JOE
Who are Helen and Amy?
TRICIA
Goddamn it, I love you so much . . .
Tricia is very close to losing it now. She moves away,
trying to gain control over her emotions.
Joe looks helpless and trapped.
Tricia gets ahold of herself and turns to face him.
TRICIA
Please tell me the truth.
Joe considers this.
JOE
You'd better sit down.
INT. ROOSEVELT HOTEL - ROOM - NIGHT
Helen, Amy and Brad are waiting in a hotel room when the door
opens and Tricia enters.
TRICIA
He'll agree to an interview.
Brad gets to his feet.
BRAD
Fantastic!
TRICIA
There are conditions.
HELEN
I thought so.
TRICIA
He needs a couple weeks to finish up
his research.
Brad looks at Helen and Amy to get their reaction to this.
HELEN
I wouldn't trust him.
AMY
Me neither.
TRICIA
I do.
AMY
Lord knows how much more evil he can
do in two weeks.
TRICIA
We don't know he's doing anything
"evil" here.
HELEN
Where do you think AIDS comes from,
dear?
BRAD
You think it's an alien virus?
AMY
Do you have a better explanation?
HELEN
A few weeks more is out of the
question. I say we tell the world
what we know.
AMY
And go to the police.
TRICIA
I promised him no police.
AMY
That wasn't wise, dear.
HELEN
What else did you promise him?
TRICIA
After the interview, he can go back
to where he came from.
HELEN
You sound like you're on his side.
TRICIA
I didn't know there were sides here.
HELEN
Tricia, he's an impostor. He's an
alien. He's been studying us like
bugs, infecting us with strange
diseases to see how we respond, Lord
knows what else.
AMY
He has to be stopped, not pampered.
BRAD
Ladies, I think we're getting ahead
of ourselves. Tricia, is there any
way I could have a brief interview
right away? Just to set the ground
rules?
TRICIA
I could ask. But not tonight.
BRAD
Of course.
TRICIA
I'll talk to him in the morning. If
you'll excuse me, I'm exhausted.
She turns and leaves.
AMY
She's still in love with him, poor
dear.
INT. ROOSEVELT HOTEL - TRICIA'S ROOM - NIGHT
Tricia comes into her room. She plops down on the bed.
She stares up at the ceiling until the tears come.
INT. HILTON - DINING ROOM - DAY
Joe and George are having breakfast. They are having Eggs
Benedict, and George inspects each bite carefully before
putting it into his mouth.
JOE
Like it?
GEORGE
I'm not sure.
They eat some more.
JOE
I think we have a problem.
GEORGE
Pardon me?
JOE
Tricia knows.
GEORGE
Tricia knows what?
JOE
Who I am.
George looks at him with interest and concern.
JOE
Not the details, of course. It's
actually pretty complicated, the way
she explained it, but she knows I'm
not from here.
GEORGE
How could she possibly know?
JOE
She's not the only one. Helen, the
woman I lived with over 40 years
ago - and Amy, that I lived with 20
years ago. And unfortunately there's
a magazine reporter involved, too.
George gets up from the table.
GEORGE
Don't tell me this here!
He hurries off, as Joe scrambles to follow him.
INT. HILTON - SUITE - DAY
George is very upset at what Joe has told him.
GEORGE
You've jeopardized the entire
development plan!
JOE
If that's true, then I'm glad. I
don't approve of it.
GEORGE
Which is insubordination - and cause
enough to relieve you of your duties
here.
JOE
Being discovered was bound to happen
sooner or later.
GEORGE
I'm taking over your assignment.
You'll be returning to Alpha as soon
as I can arrange it.
Joe's jaw drops. This is the last thing he expected to hear
and the last thing he wants to happen.
JOE
That's not fair.
GEORGE
Tonight, if possible.
JOE
Who made this decision to turn Earth
into a zoo? There was no talk of
that when I left.
GEORGE
You left a long time ago. I was
hoping you'd cooperate in the
transition, but since you won't, you
leave me no choice.
JOE
You need me. I know more about
Earthlings than anyone.
George thinks a moment.
GEORGE
This reporter - who is he?
JOE
Brad Mccall. He writes for Time.
GEORGE
Time as in eternity?
JOE
It's the name of a magazine.
GEORGE
And he's also in town?
JOE
They're all staying at the Roosevelt
Hotel.
George turns and starts to leave.
JOE
There must be a compromise we can
work out. Let me talk to the
committee.
George exits without responding. Joe takes a deep breath.
EXT. HILTON - DAY
A cab pulls up in front of the Hilton. Tricia gets out.
As she does, George comes out of the hotel and turns up the
street. Tricia sees him - but he doesn't notice her.
Tricia enters the hotel.
INT. HILTON - SUITE - DAY
Joe opens the door to find Tricia. He lets her in.
JOE
I was just going to go looking for
you.
TRICIA
Really?
JOE
Something's come up. I may have to
leave sooner than I thought.
Tricia looks at him, waiting for more.
JOE
I'm being called home.
TRICIA
When? And why?
JOE
Maybe tonight. It's complicated.
The news slaps Tricia in the face, and her expression is
flushed with shock. Suddenly, spontaneously, she is in his
arms, holding him, kissing him . . .
TRICIA
Joe . . .
. . . and slowly Joe begins to respond, kissing her back,
until their growing passion moves them toward the bedroom.
INT. ROOSEVELT HOTEL - ROOM - DAY
Helen, Amy and Brad sit around a table playing cards when
there is a knock on the door.
Brad is the first to get up.
BRAD
I'll get it.
He opens the door to find George.
GEORGE
Brad McCall?
BRAD
Yes.
GEORGE
There's a message for you at the desk
downstairs.
He turns to call to the women inside.
BRAD
I'll be right back.
INT. ROOSEVELT HOTEL - HALLWAY - DAY
Brad follows George down the hallway toward the elevator.
BRAD
You know what it's about?
GEORGE
I just work here, sir.
They get to the elevator, and George presses the button.
There's an awkward silence as they wait.
Then the door opens, and they step inside.
INT. ROOSEVELT HOTEL - ELEVATOR - DAY
They are alone in the elevator.
Suddenly George grabs Brad by the head, his hands pressing
the writer's forehead as if he were squeezing a melon.
George's grip is incredibly strong, putting Brad in great
pain.
Then a GLOWING LIGHT surrounds Brad's head.
George has his eyes closed, in great concentration.
Both suddenly TWITCH, dramatically, as if they have been
shocked by an electric current.
When George speaks now, it is from Brad's body and in the
VOICE of Brad. George has managed to exchange the host bodies
for their individual energy systems.
In other words, George now looks like and talks like Brad,
and Brad looks like and talks like George.
GEORGE (AS BRAD)
Sorry about that.
BRAD (AS GEORGE)
What the hell is this?
GEORGE (AS BRAD)
And sorry about this, too.
He sprays Brad with a small canister, and Brad passes out.
George punches an elevator button. The elevator stops, and
the door opens.
George drags the body of Brad out into the hallway, leaving
it there and getting back into the elevator.
He punches a button again.
INT. ROOSEVELT HOTEL - HALLWAY - DAY
The elevator opens as George (as Brad) gets out. He hurries
to the door of the women's room. He tries it - but it's
locked.
He knocks.
Helen answers the door.
GEORGE (AS BRAD)
I've just been put on a major story.
I'm leaving town.
HELEN
But what about your interview?
GEORGE (AS BRAD)
Sorry, no time. I have a plane to
catch. Anyway, I think this is all
a hoax.
HELEN
What?
GEORGE (AS BRAD)
I think you should both go back home.
This entire affair is a hoax.
He hurries off, leaving Helen staring at him, dumbfounded.
She goes back into the room.
INT. ROOSEVELT HOTEL - ROOM - DAY
Amy notices her confused expression.
AMY
What was that about?
HELEN
Brad's leaving. He thinks this is a
hoax.
Amy is as surprised by the news as Helen.
INT. HILTON - SUITE - BEDROOM - DAY
Joe and Tricia are cuddling after lovemaking when they hear
the door open outside.
JOE
It must be George.
He slips out of bed.
TRICIA
He's also . . .?
Joe nods and goes into the main area.
INT. HILTON - SUITE - DAY
Joe enters, seeing a complete stranger (George looking like
Brad) in the room.
JOE
I beg your pardon.
GEORGE (AS BRAD)
You'll be leaving at midnight.
JOE
Who are you?
GEORGE (AS BRAD)
It is I, George. I mean me, George.
JOE
Why did you take a new body?
GEORGE (AS BRAD)
It's a long story.
Tricia comes into the room, wearing one of Joe's bathrobes.
George is beside himself, seeing her.
TRICIA
Brad?
GEORGE (AS BRAD)
Get her out of here!
TRICIA
What are you doing here.
JOE
This is George. He took a new body.
TRICIA
But it's Brad's body.
JOE
George, what's going on here?
GEORGE (AS BRAD)
Too many people are snooping around.
You haven't been very careful, have
you?
JOE
We can trust Tricia.
GEORGE
We can trust nobody!
He turns and heads for the door.
TRICIA
I have something to say here!
At the door, George turns and stares at Joe.
GEORGE (AS BRAD)
I'm sending you home. I'll phone
with details.
And he's gone.
Tricia goes to Joe, and they embrace.
TRICIA
Joe, I don't like this. What
happened to Brad?
JOE
He's fine. He just looks like George
looked before.
TRICIA
I don't understand.
JOE
I can't explain it right now.
TRICIA
Joe, I-- . . .
JOE
I said, I can't explain it! I'm
sorry. Trish, I don't want to leave
like this. I need to contact my
people.
TRICIA
Can I help?
JOE
I need to be alone for a while.
This visibly hurts Tricia. Joe turns away, avoiding her.
EXT. HILTON - DAY
Tricia comes out of the hotel and hails a cab.
As she gets into it, George (as Brad) appears from out of a
doorway and gets into the cab behind Tricia's.
EXT. SEATTLE STREETS - DAY
George's cab follows Tricia's cab through the streets of the
city.
EXT. ROOSEVELT HOTEL - DAY
The first cab stops, and Tricia gets out, going into the
hotel.
A moment later, the second cab stops, and George (as Brad)
goes into the hotel.
INT. ROOSEVELT HOTEL - HALLWAY - DAY
An elevator door opens, and Tricia comes out. She moves down
the hallway.
The second elevator door opens. George (as Brad) gets out
and follows her.
Tricia comes to a door and knocks on it. Helen opens the
door, and Tricia enters the room.
George carefully approaches the door. He glances around,
measuring his next move, when he spots a bellboy coming down
the hallway.
George walks to the bellboy.
GEORGE (AS BRAD)
There seems to be a problem on the
stairway.
BELLBOY
What kind of problem, sir?
GEORGE (AS BRAD)
I'll show you.
George leads the way to the door leading to the stairs.
INT. ROOSEVELT HOTEL - DAY
AMY
It all happened so suddenly.
HELEN
Brad said this was all a hoax, he had
another story to do - and that's that.
TRICIA
It's not a hoax. And it wasn't Brad.
That's George in Brad's body.
Helen and Amy exchange a glance of surprise.
HELEN
Who's George?
INT. ROOSEVELT HOTEL - STAIRWELL - DAY
As soon as George (as Brad) and the bellboy are in the
stairwell, George turns and, using the same grip as before,
drops the bellboy to his knees, a GLOWING LIGHT surrounding
his forehead.
Then both TWITCH, and their energy systems exchange bodies.
BELLBOY (AS BRAD)
What the hell?
GEORGE (AS BELLBOY)
Sorry to have to do this.
He sprays the bellboy with the canister, knocking him out.
George, as the bellboy, leaves the stairwell.
INT. ROOSEVELT HOTEL - ROOM - DAY
There's a knock on the door, and Helen answers. George
(bellboy) is at the door.
GEORGE (AS BELLBOY)
There's a message at the desk for the
young lady.
HELEN
Tricia?
Tricia comes forward.
TRICIA
Yes?
GEORGE (AS BELLBOY)
You have a message at the desk.
TRICIA
I'm not expecting a message.
GEORGE (AS BELLBOY)
A family emergency. Something about
your mother, I believe.
TRICIA
I'll be right down.
She quickly closes the door, then gestures to Helen and Amy
to keep quiet.
INT. ROOSEVELT HOTEL - HALLWAY - DAY
George (as bellboy) faces the closed door. He waits
patiently for Tricia to come out. He puts his ear to the
door.
INT. ROOSEVELT HOTEL - ROOM - DAY
Tricia leads Helen and Amy away from the door, then speaks to
them quietly.
TRICIA
He said it was a family emergency.
Both my parents are dead.
INT. ROOSEVELT HOTEL - HALLWAY - DAY
George is waiting for Tricia to come out when the door to the
stairwell opens, and the bellboy (as Brad) moves slowly into
the hallway, still dizzy. He sees "himself" down the hallway.
BELLBOY (AS BRAD)
Hey, you!
There is an inter-hotel phone on the wall and the bellboy
moves quickly to it.
Seeing this, George (as bellboy) hurries down the hallway.
The bellboy (as Brad) is on the phone.
BELLBOY (AS BRAD)
Jane, this is Tim. . . . Of course it
is. Call the police. . . . Dammit,
it's me! I need the police and a
doctor!
He slams down the phone, exasperated (i.e. Jane on the other
end hears "Brad's voice," not her co-worker's).
INT. ROOSEVELT HOTEL - ROOM - DAY
Tricia, Helen and Amy carefully open the door and peer out.
The coast is clear.
INT. ROOSEVELT HOTEL - HALLWAY - DAY
The three women move into the hallway - and see "Brad" moving
toward them.
HELEN
Brad?
Tricia grabs Helen and Amy and moves them back into the hotel
room.
INT. ROOSEVELT HOTEL - ROOM - DAY
Tricia slams the door and puts on the safety chain.
TRICIA
That's George in Brad's body.
HELEN
I'm calling the police.
She heads for the phone but Tricia intercepts her.
TRICIA
Wait.
AMY
He saw us! Helen, call the police.
TRICIA
I promised no police. We're just
going to sit tight.
The three women stare at the door, as if waiting for it to
explode open at any moment.
INT. HOSPITAL ROOM - DAY
Brad (as George) is in a hospital bed, on the telephone.
BRAD (AS GEORGE)
I don't care what I sound like, it's
Brad!
The voice on the other end isn't convinced, and Brad slams
down the receiver. He gets up and starts to dress.
A NURSE enters the room.
BRAD (AS GEORGE)
Lady, don't say it. I'm rapidly
becoming irrational and dangerous.
The nurse considers this, then backs out of the room.
INT. ROOSEVELT HOTEL - HALLWAY - DAY
The door opens and Tricia peers into the hallway. It's safe.
She gestures, and Helen and Amy follow her out into the
hallway. They hurry to the elevator.
EXT. ROOSEVELT HOTEL - DAY
Outside the hotel, Tricia hails a cab. The ladies get in.
CABBY
Where to, ladies?
TRICIA
The Hilton.
INT. HILTON - SUITE - DAY
Joe is at a table, sitting in front of an open briefcase,
which houses a complex electronic signaling system. He's
trying to contact home - but without luck.
INT. HILTON - HALLWAY - DAY
A HILTON BELLBOY is unlocking the door, letting in Tricia,
Helen and Amy.
HILTON BELLBOY
You've got to quit locking yourself
out.
TRICIA
I know, I'm terrible. My husband
says I have a mind like a sieve.
Thank you so much for your help.
The three women enter the room.
INT. HILTON - SUITE - DAY
Joe is still at the electronic device when the women enter.
He looks up and sees them.
HELEN
Don't try anything. The police know
we're here!
Joe gets to his feet.
JOE
Trish?
TRICIA
There's no police.
Helen gives Tricia a dirty look.
AMY
But the desk clerk knows we're here.
He'll come looking for us if we don't
return safely.
JOE
Who are you?
Joe studies them, remembering.
JOE
Helen? Amy? You've changed so much.
HELEN
We get old here, Joe.
JOE
I know.
TRICIA
What can we do to help?
Helen and Amy react to this.
TRICIA
I'll help, even if they won't.
JOE
Actually I do need your help.
HELEN
Don't trust him, Tricia.
AMY
He's still Mr. Smooth-Tongue.
JOE
How could I have stayed with you,
since you grow old and I don't? I've
meant no one any harm. But now -
there's been a change. I don't
understand it, but I have to try and
stop it. I can't do it alone.
TRICIA
What kind of change?
JOE
My people plan to turn Earth into a
kind of zoo, a destination for
tourists. They think you're
primitive and cute.
The women regard one another, letting this sink in.
TRICIA
How can I help?
The phone rings.
JOE
Excuse me.
He answers the phone.
JOE
Hello? . . . You sound different. .
. . . I know where it is.
He hangs up.
JOE
I'm supposed to go home tonight. I
think I may be able to change his
mind - but there's no point if I
can't stop them.
HELEN
I'm calling the police right now.
She starts away but Tricia stops her.
TRICIA
How can we beat them that way? They
obviously have superior technology.
JOE
She's right. The only way is to
convince my people that you
Earthlings aren't as primitive and
exotic as you appear to be.
There's a silence, as the larger meaning and challenge of
this sinks in.
EXT. HILTON - DAY
The women come out and get into a cab.
EXT. ROOSEVELT HOTEL - DAY
The women get out of the cab in front of the Roosevelt Hotel.
Brad (as George) comes out of a doorway to them.
BRAD (AS GEORGE)
Where the hell have you been? It's
Brad.
INT. COCKTAIL LOUNGE - DAY
Brad and the women sit around a corner table, speaking in
hushed tones.
BRAD (AS GEORGE)
I can't get my editor to believe it's
me. But I'm writing this story, even
if I have to give it to the Inquirer.
Unfortunately, I'm going to need more
evidence than I have.
TRICIA
If we help Joe, maybe he'll give you
an interview - and help you get your
body back.
AMY
Can we trust him?
TRICIA
I don't think we have a choice.
The truth of this sinks in, all around the table.
EXT. SPACE NEEDLE - NIGHT
Joe is standing near the space needle, waiting. He looks at
his watch.
From out of nowhere, George (as bellboy) appears.
GEORGE (AS BELLBOY)
It's me. I have a cab waiting.
JOE
I think there's more things you need
to see before I go. You really don't
understand how primitive these people
are. They have former teachers and
nurses living on the streets.
GEORGE (AS BELLBOY)
What do you mean?
JOE
They get fired and can't find jobs.
They lose their homes. They have no
money. They live on the streets and
sleep in alleys and doorways, like
stray dogs.
GEORGE (AS BELLBOY)
You expect me to believe that?
JOE
I can show you. Listen, I made a
mistake. You're the businessman,
like you say. I know you want to
impress the committee, and I can show
you things you have to see to
believe. Give me a few more days,
maybe a week, and then I'll go home.
You'll have the strongest possible
case to show the committee.
George is thinking, definitely interested.
JOE
I can show you families with young
children living on the street. They
have to build makeshift shacks out of
cardboard boxes.
GEORGE (AS BELLBOY)
The natives let entire families live
in cardboard boxes? What kind of
society is this?
JOE
I told you, they're more primitive
than you think.
INT. HILTON - SUITE - NIGHT
Joe comes into the suite, where Tricia is waiting for him.
JOE
He bought it. I only have a few
days, but it's better than nothing.
Did you call her?
TRICIA
She's expecting us.
JOE
What about Helen and Amy?
TRICIA
I don't know if we can trust them or
not. They don't know I'm here. Brad
is still after his story.
JOE
If we get a happy ending, it's all
his.
EXT. AIRPORT - NIGHT
A jet lands.
INT. AIRPORT - NIGHT
Bi Jingjing meets Tricia and Joe as they enter the terminal.
BI JINGJING
Are you all right?
TRICIA
Under the circumstances.
BI JINGJING
Hello.
She offers her hand, and Joe shakes it.
JOE
I've heard so much about you.
BI JINGJING
Now it's my turn to hear about you.
INT. BI'S HOME - LIVING ROOM - NIGHT
Tricia, Joe and Bi sit on pillows on the floor in the Chinese-
decorated room.
TRICIA
I know it's hard to believe.
BI JINGJING
Yes, it certainly is. Is there any
way you can - well, show me
something? Not absolute proof
necessarily - but anything?
TRICIA
Bi, as hard as this is to understand,
please believe-- . . .
JOE
Wait. There is something I can do.
He moves closer to Tricia.
JOE
You're going to have to trust me.
TRICIA
I do.
Joe reaches out and grasps her head, in the grip we've seen
George use. As before, a GLOW forms around her head as he
holds it.
Tricia looks scared. Bi looks astonished.
Then there is the sudden TWITCH - and their energy systems
exchange bodies.
JOE (AS TRICIA)
I'm now in Tricia's body.
BI JINGJING
You've got to be kidding.
TRICIA (AS JOE)
Bi, truly, this is me. I'll tell you
something Joe would have no way of
knowing: you're gay.
BI JINGJING
Help me Buddha. What do you want me
to do?
JOE (AS TRICIA)
You're getting an award in
Washington. Can you introduce me to
the President?
BI JINGJING
I can get you as far as the First
Lady. We went to school together.
After that, you're on your own.
JOE (AS TRICIA)
Get us an appointment for tomorrow.
He (as she) stands up.
TRICIA (AS JOE)
Joe, I want my body back!
JOE (AS TRICIA)
Sorry.
He (as she) leans down and grasps Tricia/Joe's head. The
GLOW again, and the TWITCH - and their energy systems are
back where they belong.
BI JINGJING
How does something like that feel?
Tricia takes a deep breath.
TRICIA
There's nothing I can compare it to.
It's weird. But kind of sensual, too.
JOE
You want to try it?
BI JINGJING
No thank you! I'm calling
Washington, and you two are going on
your way.
EXT. WASHINGTON D.C. - LANDMARKS - DAY
Establishing shot of the nation's Capital. We see the WHITE
HOUSE.
INT. WHITE HOUSE - ROOM - DAY
Tricia and Joe are waiting in a small room filled with
historical antiques. Tricia is visibly nervous.
TRICIA
I hate waiting.
Joe is too preoccupied to reply.
The door opens and the FIRST LADY walks in. She is a
striking woman in her late 40s.
FIRST LADY
You must be Tricia. Bi says you're
her best competitor.
TRICIA
Thanks so much for giving us some
time. This is Joe.
FIRST LADY
Hello, Joe. What can I do for you?
Tricia turns to Joe, who doesn't know how to begin.
TRICIA
Joe . . .?
JOE
This will be hard for you to believe,
but I am not from this planet. I was
on the spacecraft that crashed in
Roswell, in your year 1947.
The First Lady just looks at him. Then to Tricia:
FIRST LADY
Bi didn't mention you were a
practical joker.
JOE
I can prove this to you.
He takes a step toward the First Lady, as if the make the
grip on her head, but Tricia moves quickly to stop him.
TRICIA
Joe, no! We don't do that here.
She's the First Lady. It would be
improper.
FIRST LADY
What were you going to do?
JOE
Very well. I can show you another
way.
He suddenly sits in the floor, taking a position that looks
like meditation. Tricia, who has never seen him do this
before, looks embarrassed to be there.
FIRST LADY
You're telling me he's an alien?
TRICIA
It's true.
The First Lady looks at Tricia as if Tricia were crazy.
Suddenly the same GLOW surrounds Joe, a golden halo
surrounding his entire body.
Then there is a POPPING SOUND and Joe's energy system breaks
free of his body, which still rests in meditation, lifeless,
and A BALL OF GOLDEN LIGHT streaks rapidly around the room.
The women, shocked and scared, duck as the light beam flashes
by overhead.
Then the light returns to the body, enters it, Joe regains
consciousness, and stands up.
JOE
Do you want to see more?
FIRST LADY
I'll get my husband.
EXT. WHITE HOUSE - DAY
A line of limousines has formed as important cabinet members
are let off for an urgent meeting called by the President.
INT. WHITE HOUSE - WAR ROOM - DAY
The PRESIDENT, a handsome man in his 50s, sits at the head of
a long table. Next to him is Joe, with Tricia seated beside
him. Also represented are the SECRETARY OF DEFENSE, HEAD OF
THE JOINT CHIEFS OF STAFF, SECRETARY OF STATE, and other
cabinet members.
Joe has the floor.
JOE
I've been told you captured one of my
colleagues alive. You certainly have
our space craft. You know I'm
telling the truth.
The Secretary of State, a professorial-looking man wearing
glasses, laughs.
SECRETARY OF STATE
With all due respect, I've never seen
evidence that we captured a flying
saucer at Roswell or any place else.
PRESIDENT
With all due respect, Harry, you
haven't seen even the tip of the
iceberg of what we may or may not
have in this regard.
SECRETARY OF STATE
I see.
Tricia leans over and whispers something to Joe. He nods.
JOE
There's no time to quibble,
gentleman. I can settle your doubts
at once.
He leans forward on the table, concentrating, meditating, and
the GLOW forms around him. Then the POPPING SOUND, and his
energy system FLIES around the room like a laser beam out of
control.
The President and his staff can't believe their eyes. Some
duck under the table in panic.
Then Joe focuses his energy system back into the body.
JOE
Now I have some ideas about what we
can do.
PRESIDENT
Please, tell us!
SECRETARY OF DEFENSE
I suggest we call an immediate Code
Red and prepare for nuclear attack.
JOE
You are no match to our technology.
The only way out is to prove to the
committee that you are not as
primitive a people as you seem.
HEAD OF JOINT CHIEF OF STAFF
Primitive! We'll show you who's
goddamn primitive.
PRESIDENT
Cal, listen to the man. He's
obviously in the driver's seat here.
What can we do?
All eyes are on Joe. Tricia takes his hand.
INT. NEWSPAPER BUILDING - DAY
An elevator door opens, and Brad (as George), Helen and Amy
get out.
BRAD (AS GEORGE)
This way.
He leads the way down the hallway.
INT. NEWSPAPER BUILDING - EDITOR'S OFFICE - DAY
They reach the editor's office, which Brad enters without
knocking, followed by the ladies.
The EDITOR, a graying balding man in his 60s, sits behind his
desk, which is piled with manuscripts.
EDITOR
Can I help you?
BRAD (AS GEORGE)
It's Brad, David.
The editor picks up his phone.
BRAD (AS GEORGE)
These women are my witnesses.
EDITOR
(on phone)
This is David, I need security up
here.
BRAD (AS GEORGE)
I'm at the threshold of the story of
the century! Any century!
HELEN
You see, the man is a refugee from
Roswell.
AMY
He survived the flying saucer crash
and -- . . .
EDITOR
Out, all of you! If you leave before
security arrives, you won't be
arrested.
Brad gestures to the others that they should leave, and they
do. The editor shakes his head, watching their retreat.
EXT. MARYSVILLE - MAIN STREET - DAY
A CROWD of local people has gathered on Main Street in
Marysville, a small midwestern town.
Everyone looks up, at where the PRESIDENTIAL HELICOPTER is
hovering overhead, preparing to land.
Along Main Street, we also see the paraphernalia of a movie
set in the midst of shooting - trucks and trailers,
equipment, etc.
INT. HELICOPTER - DAY
In the helicopter are Joe, Tricia, the President and the
Secretary of State.
PRESIDENT
Harry, you've always gotten flak for
your Hollywood past. If we pull this
off, I'm giving you a medal for it.
Tricia holds Joe's arm, looking down at the crowd below.
EXT. MAIN STREET - DAY
The helicopter comes in for a landing.
A limousine moves through the crowd, beeping its horn, to
greet the landing party.
The helicopter lands, and the members of the Presidential
party get out and hurry into the limousine, which drives away.
EXT. MOVIE SET - TRAILER - DAY
The limo is parked outside a long trailer.
INT. TRAILER - DAY
The Presidential party is meeting with JOHN HALLEY, 50s, the
director of the movie. They sit around a long conference
table.
JOHN HALLEY
Mr. President, Harry tells me we're
in a national emergency. I want you
to know we're here to help you in any
way we can.
PRESIDENT
Excellent. I'll let my friend give
the details. Joe?
Tricia squeezes Joe's hand, and he rises to tell the news.
EXT. OUTDOOR CAFE - DAY
George (as bellboy) is having an espresso at the outdoor
cafe.
He is working on something, making final notes to greet the
committee.
A WAITER comes by.
WAITER
Is everything all right, sir?
GEORGE (AS BELLBOY)
Fine. Tell me - where can I find a
family living on the streets?
WAITER
Excuse me, sir?
GEORGE (AS BELLBOY)
A family living on the streets.
WAITER
We don't have that problem here, sir.
The police make sure of that.
The waiter smiles, nods and moves off.
George looks thoughtful, digesting the information.
Joe arrives and sits down.
JOE
Sorry I'm late.
GEORGE (AS BELLBOY)
The waiter told me there are no
homeless families here.
JOE
He's probably right. But we leave
this afternoon - and believe me, you
won't be disappointed.
INT. MARYSVILLE - MAIN STREET - DAY
A transformation is underway, turning the "movie set" into a
scene that brings the worst urban squalor to Main Street
America.
Makeshift shacks of cardboard and spare lumber are being
constructed.
Actors and actresses are being fitted into new costumes of
dirty cast-away clothing.
The director, John Halley, is in charge, with Tricia serving
as his assistant.
JOHN HALLEY
Are we getting there?
TRICIA
I think so. What you've done is
amazing.
JOHN HALLEY
How about coffee?
Tricia smiles and nods.
INT. TRAILER - DAY
John pours Tricia a cup and then himself. They sit at the
conference table.
JOHN HALLEY
You're in love with him, aren't you?
TRICIA
I suppose I can't hide it.
JOHN HALLEY
No, you can't. It must be - hell, I
have no idea what it's like. Tell me.
TRICIA
No different, really. Until recently
I had no idea he wasn't just like us.
JOHN HALLEY
Not a clue?
TRICIA
No. Except he never ages. I noticed
that but just thought he was one of
the lucky ones.
JOHN HALLEY
What happens when this is over?
TRICIA
I don't want to think about it.
EXT. MAIN STREET - NIGHT
The transformation is complete.
Scattered fires line Main Street, with families huddled
around them, some cooking beans in a pot, others there for
warmth.
Tricia walks the street alone, surveying the incredible
scene, worse than any depression she's seen photographs of,
the picture of an American town gone bankrupt.
An actor recognizes her and approaches.
ACTOR
When's the big test?
TRICIA
Tomorrow.
ACTOR
How're we doing?
TRICIA
Wonderful. It looks so real. I'm
practically in tears.
The actor grins and calls to the others.
ACTOR
She likes it!
A chorus of cheers rises from the crowd.
EXT. MIDWEST - SKY - DAY
A helicopter flies over farmland.
INT. HELICOPTER - DAY
The passengers are Joe and George (as bellboy).
Joe points ahead at the town of Marysville.
JOE
There it is.
George leans to the window to look.
EXT. MAIN STREET - DAY
The same makeshift camp fills Main Street.
Children play stick ball in the street. They look like
street urchins from an old movie.
A long line comes out of a doorway, over which the words
"SOUP KITCHEN" have been painted.
Everywhere are signs of poverty and the boredom that comes
from hopelessness.
INT. HELICOPTER - DAY
George stares wide-eyed at the scene below.
GEORGE
The committee won't believe this. I
hardly believe it myself.
JOE
Want to land and look around?
GEORGE
No. I want to get the committee here
as soon as possible. This is the
clincher.
He moves back from the window.
GEORGE
How many other towns are like this?
Joe, looking like a man on the spot, clears his throat before
answering.
JOE
Quite a few. But this is one of the
worst.
GEORGE
Let's get back so I can call in the
committee.
EXT. MARYSVILLE - SKY - DAY
The helicopter zooms off.
EXT. MAIN STREET - DAY
On the street below, Tricia looks up at the departing
helicopter.
An actor appears beside her.
ACTOR
What's wrong?
TRICIA
I'm not sure. I expected them to
land.
She moves toward a doorway.
INT. MAIN STREET - BUILDING - DAY
Tricia enters to find the President and Secretary of State
looking out the front window.
PRESIDENT
Why didn't they land?
TRICIA
I'm not sure.
SECRETARY OF STATE
Maybe he wasn't fooled.
PRESIDENT
Joe will contact us, won't he?
TRICIA
I'm sure he will.
But she looks troubled, weighing the possibility that he
won't.
INT. MOTEL - ROOM - NIGHT
Tricia is in the bathroom, getting sick, when the phone rings.
She moves into the room, wiping her face with a towel, and
picks up the phone.
TRICIA
Hello?
INTERCUT PHONE CONVERSATION
Joe is calling from a hotel room.
JOE
It worked perfectly. All he needed
was a glance.
TRICIA
That's great!
JOE
Except he wants to return with the
committee sooner than I thought.
I'll try to take them to a basketball
game first. But just in case, try to
make the changes as soon as possible.
TRICIA
I'll tell them. Joe - are you okay?
JOE
So far, so good.
TRICIA
I miss you.
There is a silence on Joe's end.
TRICIA
We'll get started right away.
JOE
I couldn't do this without you,
Tricia.
Tricia is close to tears.
TRICIA
Call me before you leave. Good night.
She hangs up. Suddenly, she is feeling sick again, and
rushes into the bathroom.
INT. ROOSEVELT HOTEL - DAY
In the lobby, Brad (as George), Helen and Amy are talking to
the bellboy (as Brad). Brad is taking notes.
Two SECURITY OFFICERS, escorted by the HOTEL MANAGER, arrive
to escort the group out.
EXT. ROOSEVELT HOTEL - DAY
Brad (as George), bellboy (as Brad), Helen and Amy come
outside after being thrown out.
BELLBOY (AS BRAD)
Nobody believes it's me.
BRAD (AS GEORGE)
Why should they when you look like me?
BELLBOY (AS BRAD)
If you find this guy wearing my body,
you let me know, okay?
BRAD (AS GEORGE)
Don't worry, you'll be hearing from
us again. I guarantee it.
BELLBOY (AS BRAD)
My kids look at me and start crying.
My wife even put out a restraining
order. This is crazy.
He moves off down the street.
HELEN
Then George must look like the
bellboy.
BRAD (AS GEORGE)
Unless he exchanged bodies again.
Let's hope he didn't.
EXT. MAIN STREET - DAY
A frenzy of activity on Main Street, turning the economically
depressed mask into a homey attractive community.
John Halley stands on a platform overlooking the scene. With
him is an ASSISTANT, an attractive young woman in her 20s.
JOHN HALLEY
Have you seen Tricia?
ASSISTANT
She wasn't feeling well this morning.
I loaned her my car to see a doctor.
INT. ADJACENT TOWN - DOCTOR'S OFFICE - DAY
A young DOCTOR is monitoring Tricia's pregnancy. His office
is in a small town near Marysville.
TRICIA
How soon before we know if it's
normal?
DOCTOR
You sound worried. Is there
something I should know?
TRICIA
Not really. I'm just - concerned.
DOCTOR
When do you see your regular doctor
next?
TRICIA
In two weeks.
DOCTOR
He should be able to tell you in the
next month or so. Everything's
looking fine so far.
He stops the examination.
DOCTOR
So what kind of movie are you folks
filming over in Marysville? I hear
all kinds of wild stories.
EXT. STREET - PHONE BOOTH - DAY
Tricia is at a phone booth, talking on the phone. A Volvo is
parked nearby.
TRICIA
Susan, I really need you here.
EXT. MARYSVILLE - MAIN STREET - DAY
The Volvo drives into town on Main Street. Already the
town's face lift is well underway.
INT. VOLVO - DAY
Tricia is driving. She pulls to the curb and gets out.
EXT. MAIN STREET - DAY
The assistant comes over to Tricia for her keys.
ASSISTANT
Everything okay?
TRICIA
I think it's just stress. Thanks for
the loan.
ASSISTANT
John needs to see you.
INT. TRAILER - DAY
Tricia sits at the table in the trailer, with John, the
President and the Secretary of State.
PRESIDENT
I'm not sure what he really needs.
Is it enough to have the school fixed
up? How do we communicate that
teachers matter here?
TRICIA
And parents. We need to show that
raising kids is more important than
anything else we do with our lives.
JOHN HALLEY
Isn't it?
Everyone looks at him.
JOHN HALLEY
I guess I meant - shouldn't it be?
EXT. MOTEL - NIGHT
A car pulls into the motel and parks. Susan gets out, finds
Tricia's room number, and knocks on the door.
INT. MOTEL - ROOM - NIGHT
Tricia opens the door, and the women immediately embrace.
INT. MOTEL - ROOM - NIGHT (LATER)
They sit at the small motel table, drinking pop.
SUSAN
I think it's your best alternative,
Trish, and I'm beside you all the
way. Do you have an appointment?
TRICIA
I was thinking of waiting til after
the trials. It's only a week. But
I don't even know if I can compete
now.
EXT. MARYSVILLE - MAIN STREET - NIGHT
Tricia and Susan are walking along Main Street. Marysville
has a new face now, a picturebook, charming small town in the
midwest, where Mom and Apple Pie still mean something.
But there's a difference: banners over the street and
posters in store windows congratulate a "Teacher of the
Week", others honor a "Parent of the Week."
SUSAN
Did I ever tell you about my abortion?
Tricia looks surprised at this.
SUSAN
Thought you knew everything about me,
didn't you? It was when we were in
college.
TRICIA
I can't believe you didn't tell me.
SUSAN
I was so ashamed I didn't tell a
soul. In fact, you're the first.
Tricia takes her hand.
TRICIA
Did you regret it?
SUSAN
Yes and no. It's never easy. But
yours is definitely a different
situation.
TRICIA
Yes and no. A part of me wants his
baby so bad. No matter what it would
turn out to be.
Susan studies her, looking as if she's trying to reach deep
within Tricia to understand her meaning. Tricia picks up on
this.
TRICIA
Does that sound too weird?
SUSAN
No. Whatever it is, it's a part of
you now. I know it's not easy.
They continue walking, their arms around one another.
EXT. OUTDOOR CAFE - DAY
George (as bellboy) is sitting at a table with THREE MEN IN
BUSINESS SUITES, the members of the committee. Each
committee member is sniffing and examining an espresso with
scientific interest.
GEORGE (AS BELLBOY)
You actually do get used to it.
COMMITTEE MEMBER #1 gives him a skeptical look.
COMMITTEE MEMBER #1
Is it addictive?
GEORGE (AS BELLBOY)
Actually, I'm not sure. I don't
think so.
At a nearby table, Helen is observing them and dialing a
number on a cellular phone.
HELEN
He's here, looking exactly like the
bellboy. Three others are with him.
She nods at what is being said and hangs up.
COMMITTEE MEMBER #2
What's the agenda?
EXT. STREET - OUTDOOR CAFE - DAY
Joe is moving quickly down the street, late to his
appointment.
EXT. OUTDOOR CAFE - DAY
Helen is watching the other table closely.
George (as bellboy) sees Joe approaching and stands up.
GEORGE (AS BELLBOY)
Gentlemen, our scientist and liaison
officer is here!
Beaming, George holds out his hand and Joe, arriving and
nodding at the others, grasps it.
The committee members, uncertain of the custom here, struggle
to their feet and hold out their hands, looking awkward and
comic.
Joe shakes their hands, one at a time.
JOE
I'm sure you're all eager to begin
the tour.
Helen sees that they are getting ready to leave and is in a
panic what to do. She gestures for a waiter, who hurries
over.
HELEN
I'm expecting some people to meet me,
but I have to leave. Will you ask
them to wait and I'll phone as soon
as I can?
WAITER
Certainly, madam.
Joe, George and the committee members are already leaving the
cafe, and Helen hurries to follow them.
INT. MARYSVILLE - MOTEL - NIGHT
Tricia and Susan are playing cards, when the phone rings.
Tricia almost knocks over her chair getting to it.
TRICIA
Hello?
She nods to Susan, communicating that, yes, it's Joe.
TRICIA
We're ready when you are.
She holds a hand over the mouthpiece and talks to Susan:
TRICIA
They're in Seattle for a basketball
game.
Back on the phone:
TRICIA
Okay, we'll see you then. Are you
okay?
Whatever Joe says moves her almost to tears.
TRICIA
I love you, too.
She hangs up.
TRICIA
He said he loves me.
Susan gets up and goes to her.
SUSAN
We don't know what that really means
where he comes from. Trish, I know
it's hard, but you're going to have
to let him go.
The women embrace.
INT. BASKETBALL ARENA - NIGHT
Joe steps away from a pay phone and rejoins George and the
committee members in the stands.
Also in the stands, observing Joe and the others, are Helen,
Amy and Brad (as George).
BRAD (AS GEORGE)
Why basketball?
AMY
Maybe they don't grow that tall. He
said they want to turn us into a zoo.
HELEN
For them, maybe it's like looking at
giraffes.
The possibility that she's right concerns them all.
EXT. MARYSVILLE - MAIN STREET - DAY
A new day on Main Street - and the face lift is remarkable
now, in contrast to what we saw earlier.
Small groups of children of all ages gather around "mentors"
and "teachers" all along the street. Spontaneous classrooms
and "lessons" are underway, as if the very life blood of the
town had to do with educating the young.
Tricia and Susan stroll along Main Street, accompanied by
John Halley.
TRICIA
This is perfect, John. I think Joe
will be very pleased.
They walk a bit in silence.
SUSAN
What would it take to make the world
really like this?
JOHN HALLEY
A miracle.
EXT. SMALL AIRPORT - DAY
A helicopter has just taken off. Watching from a distance
are Helen and Amy.
Brad (as George) arrives.
BRAD (AS GEORGE)
They're heading for Marysville.
EXT. MIDWEST - SKY - DAY
The helicopter is in the sky over the Midwest, heading toward
Marysville.
INT. HELICOPTER - DAY
Joe, George (as bellboy) and the three committee members are
the passengers.
George smiles at Joe, confident of his mission. Joe nods and
smiles back.
The committee members gawk out the windows, all eyes,
marveling at this strange new planet.
EXT. MARYSVILLE - MAIN STREET - DAY
An actor sees the helicopter first.
ACTOR
They're here!
John Halley has a portable bull horn and speaks to the actors
along Main Street.
JOHN HALLEY
Everybody in character now! We don't
know how long this will take - but
until that bird is back in the air,
we are an educational community here,
with kids our focus and priority.
Action!
The helicopter makes its approach to land.
Tricia and Susan exchange a quick glance, both looking
worried, then wait for the landing.
INT. HELICOPTER - DAY
George (as bellboy) notices the considerable difference from
the previous visit. He leans close to Joe.
GEORGE (AS BELLBOY)
What's going on down there?
JOE
I'm not sure.
The helicopter has landed, and Joe gets to his feet to
address the committee members.
JOE
Here we are, gentlemen!
George looks like he smells a rat.
EXT. MAIN STREET - DAY
Joe is the first off the helicopter. Then he turns to help
the committee members off, one by one.
George is the last to step down, leaning close to Joe.
GEORGE (AS BELLBOY)
If you have anything to do with this--
. . .
But Joe is already moving away, to escort the committee
members into a survey of town.
George catches up to them.
GEORGE (AS BELLBOY)
Apparently they were expecting us and
cleaned up. I think we should speak
to the mayor.
John Halley arrives, as if on cue.
JOHN HALLEY
Welcome to Marysville, gentlemen.
You've come at a good time. We're
honoring our teachers of the week
today.
Joe starts to reply but George butts in, beating him to it.
GEORGE (AS BELLBOY)
We want to see the homeless families.
JOHN HALLEY
Homeless families? In America
You've got to be kidding.
GEORGE (AS BELLBOY)
The families that were camped out on
the street last week! I saw them
myself!
John laughs.
JOHN HALLEY
I don't know what you were on, sir,
but-- . . .
GEORGE (AS BELLBOY)
There's no point in staying here,
gentlemen. We've been set up.
He glares at Joe.
COMMITTEE MEMBER #1
You say you honor teachers here?
JOHN HALLEY
The first week of every month. The
second week we honor parents, the
third week we honor our health care
workers and-- . . .
George has heard enough. He tries to herd the committee
members back to the helicopter.
GEORGE (AS BELLBOY)
They are hiding the truth from us!
Believe me, I know what I saw!
John shrugs and looks at him like he's lost his marbles. By
their expressions, the committee members are wondering if
John isn't right.
COMMITTEE MEMBER #2
If there are no homeless families
here, there's no point in staying.
GEORGE (AS BELLBOY)
Of course, there are! He's hidden
them, is all.
JOHN HALLEY
I sure don't know what you're talking
about.
COMMITTEE MEMBER #3
Would there be a town nearby with
homeless families?
JOHN HALLEY
I don't think you'd find a homeless
family in the entire country. This
is America!
John smiles.
George moves to Joe.
GEORGE (AS BELLBOY)
You did this!
JOE
I think you've been working too hard.
COMMITTEE MEMBER #1
Gentlemen, I think we've seen enough.
The committee members march back to the helicopter. George
starts after them, then turns to Joe, who is staying behind.
GEORGE (AS BELLBOY)
I'm not through with you!
The committee members and George get on the helicopter, which
rises back into the sky.
On the ground, Tricia moves to Joe and takes his hand.
Everyone watches the helicopter rise into the distance.
Suddenly, a spontaneous cheer rises over Main Street, and
people embrace in self-congratulation.
Susan joins Tricia and Joe. Seeing her, Tricia becomes self-
conscious and moves away, toward Susan, which Joe picks up on.
JOE
Can we all have dinner tonight?
Tricia looks at Susan, as if for permission.
SUSAN
Sounds fine with me. Trish?
TRICIA
Of course.
EXT. MARYSVILLE - MOTEL - NIGHT
The porch light is on at Tricia's motel.
INT. MARYSVILLE - MOTEL - NIGHT
Tricia and Susan are waiting for Joe to come by.
TRICIA
I don't know if I can do this.
SUSAN
We don't have to.
TRICIA
Not going would be worse.
EXT. MARYSVILLE - MAIN STREET - NIGHT
Joe is seeing off the President and Secretary of State, and
their party, who are getting ready to board the Presidential
helicopter.
PRESIDENT
What happens next?
JOE
I'm returning home. Things have
changed there that I need to find out
about.
PRESIDENT
Will I be seeing you again?
JOE
Perhaps so.
PRESIDENT
Up to you. You can contact me easier
than the other way around.
JOE
I understand.
PRESIDENT
Thanks for doing this for us.
JOE
I've grown fond of you.
PRESIDENT
I'm glad. May I ask one final
question?
JOE
Of course.
PRESIDENT
Are we really that primitive?
Joe considers this before replying.
PRESIDENT
It's that bad?
JOE
No, not that bad. But I wish you
would value your parents and teachers
more.
The President nods. Then he gestures to the others, it's
time to go.
The Presidential party boards the helicopter. Joe watches as
they take off.
INT. MARYSVILLE - RESTAURANT - NIGHT
Tricia, Joe and Susan are finishing dinner at a restaurant.
The silence hovering over the table suggests gloom.
Tricia sets down her fork, done. She forces a smile.
TRICIA
That was tasty.
Another silence. Finally:
JOE
I'm sorry. I'm not very good at this.
TRICIA
At what?
JOE
Saying goodbye.
TRICIA
There's no need to, really. I mean,
it's a foregone conclusion.
JOE
I have to find out what is going on
at home.
TRICIA
Of course.
JOE
That's the only reason I'm leaving.
I've grown fond of it here.
SUSAN
Really? What specifically do you
like about us?
JOE
When I hear it, I like your laughter.
I wish you did that more often.
This is too much for Tricia. She gets up from the table.
TRICIA
We have a plane to catch tomorrow.
SUSAN
That we do.
Susan also gets up. As Joe starts to stand, Tricia stops him
with:
TRICIA
We can walk back to the motel alone.
She offers her hand.
TRICIA
Have a safe trip.
Joe takes her hand and gets up.
JOE
I will miss you.
Tricia is fighting back tears.
SUSAN
Come on, Trish.
Joe won't let go of her hand.
JOE
I hope to come back.
TRICIA
What for?
SUSAN
Trish? We'd better go.
JOE
For you.
This surprises Tricia and is more than she can handle. She
moves into Joe's arms, and he holds her tightly. Susan looks
on helplessly.
SUSAN
Don't do this to her.
TRICIA
I'm okay . . .
SUSAN
Please, let's get out of here.
JOE
Could we be alone?
SUSAN
Trish?
TRICIA
I'm okay. Give us a minute alone.
SUSAN
I'll be waiting outside.
She leaves.
Joe and Tricia look into one another's eyes. No words are
necessary now, and they kiss deeply.
EXT. MARYSVILLE - RESTAURANT - NIGHT
Susan is waiting outside the restaurant. Very impatiently.
INT. MARYSVILLE - RESTAURANT - NIGHT
Finally Susan comes back inside to fetch Tricia. But she
can't find them.
Susan approaches a waitress.
SUSAN
Have you seen my friend?
WAITRESS
She and the gentleman left a moment
ago. That way.
The waitress points out a rear exit. Susan looks troubled.
INT. MARYSVILLE - MOTEL - NIGHT
Tricia and Joe are in bed, making love in Joe's room. They
have never been more passionately connected.
INT. MARYSVILLE - MOTEL - NIGHT
Later Tricia is dressing, getting ready to leave, as Joe
watches her from the bed. She catches him staring at her.
TRICIA
You're making me blush.
JOE
This is good?
TRICIA
I'm not sure.
JOE
I want to ask a favor. Wait for me.
Tricia turns to him, looking puzzled, not ready to believe
her ears.
TRICIA
You want me to . . .?
JOE
Wait for me. I won't be away long.
I want to come back to you. I want
to marry you.
Tricia almost recoils, suddenly aware of her own
vulnerability and facing a rush of interior objections to
such an extraordinary idea.
TRICIA
Joe, you don't have to tell me that.
JOE
I tell you because I am asking you to
wait.
TRICIA
I-- . . . I don't know how to respond
to something like that.
She is in a sudden hurry to get out of there.
JOE
I want to stay here, on your planet.
I want to stay with you.
TRICIA
Maybe you think so now - but in ten,
twenty years, I'll be so much older
than you.
JOE
Trish, I have thought about that and--
TRICIA
No! We're too different. We can't
make plans like that.
JOE
I love you. You don't love me?
TRICIA
Yes, but I think maybe we mean
different things, love means
different things, here and where
you're from.
JOE
I know this is hard for you to--
TRICIA
I have an early flight. I have to go.
Now the tension, the difficulty of this moment of parting, is
more than either can stand. No one moves. No one knows what
to do.
JOE
Tricia, I love you.
TRICIA
Goodbye, Joe.
She starts for the door.
JOE
Call me as soon as you arrive home.
I'll wait here til I hear from you.
TRICIA
Have a safe trip.
And she's out of there.
EXT. MARYSVILLE - MOTEL - NIGHT
Tricia comes out of the motel, an emotional mess. A part
of her wants to rush back into his arms, to believe
everything he is telling her.
Another part of her, the part that wins, wants to take
flight. She starts running down the street, just for the
energy of it.
EXT. MARYSVILLE - SMALL AIRPORT - DAY
A small jet takes off into a blue sky.
INT. SMALL JET - DAY
On the plane are Tricia and Susan. Tricia looks like she
hasn't gotten any sleep.
SUSAN
Are you all right?
Tricia nods. A liar.
EXT. HIGHWAY TO MARYSVILLE - DAY
Brad (as George) is changing a tire as Helen and Amy watch.
INT. MARYSVILLE - MOTEL - DAY
Joe has slept late and now is stirring. He rolls over. He
opens his eyes.
He sits up and finds George (as bellboy) sitting in a chair,
watching him. He is pointing a futuristic-looking gun at him.
JOE
What do you think you're going to do
with that?
GEORGE (AS BELLBOY)
There have been considerable advances
in technology since you left. You'd
be surprised what I can do with it.
JOE
Don't make a mistake. The universe
is a very big place. You can have
your zoo anywhere.
GEORGE (AS BELLBOY)
But who could be more entertaining
than these primitives?
JOE
Not as primitive as you may think.
GEORGE (AS BELLBOY)
Very clever, what you did. Now I am
going to show you how clever I can be.
He pulls the trigger and a laser beam shoots out of the gun,
hitting and freezing Joe.
George calmly puts down the gun and walks over to the bed.
His hands grab Joe's head. A beam of light forms around his
grip as before.
And suddenly, George takes over Joe's body - and Joe now
looks like the bellboy.
GEORGE (AS JOE)
I know you can hear me, "Joe." Now
I am "Joe" - and your girlfriend will
think so as well. I have a wonderful
surprise for her.
George starts for the door. Behind his frozen expression,
Joe (as bellboy) shows eyes of fright and concern.
George stops at the door and turns around.
GEORGE (AS JOE)
That will wear off. By then,
however, I will have "had my way with
her." I think that's how the
primitives put it. Have a good day.
He leaves.
Joe's eyes show that he is ready to explode with anxiety.
INT. SUSAN'S APT - DAY
Susan and Tricia have just entered the apartment, and Tricia
has gone directly to the phone. Susan regards her with a
puzzled look.
TRICIA
Joe asked me to call him.
SUSAN
Oh, Trish . . .
Susan moves into another room.
Tricia waits for an answer.
INT. MARYSVILLE - MOTEL - DAY
In Joe's room, the phone is ringing as Joe is still frozen on
the bed, helpless to answer it.
INT. SUSAN'S APT - DAY
Tricia finally gives up and hangs up.
EXT. MARYSVILLE - MAIN STREET - DAY
The rental car with Brad, Helen and Amy finally enters
Marysville.
INT. RENTAL CAR - DAY
Brad (as George) is driving. Helen sits in the front seat,
Amy in the back.
HELEN
Where do we begin?
BRAD (AS GEORGE)
With the motels. They have to be
staying somewhere.
INT. SUSAN'S APT - DINING AREA - NIGHT
Susan is serving up dinner. Tricia joins her, and they sit
down at the table.
SUSAN
Any luck?
TRICIA
Still no answer. I can't believe I
fell for it. He said he planned to
come back, he wanted to marry me.
SUSAN
How can he marry you? I mean, what
kind of life would that be for you?
TRICIA
I was even thinking of canceling
tomorrow.
SUSAN
You've got to let go, Trish. I hate
to see you this way.
TRICIA
He just said what he figured I wanted
to hear.
They start eating in silence.
EXT. MARYSVILLE - MOTEL - NIGHT
The rental car pulls into the motel where Joe is registered.
INT. MOTEL OFFICE - NIGHT
The clerk is looking through his register.
MOTEL CLERK
Room 114. Just down the way.
BRAD (AS GEORGE)
Thanks.
EXT. MOTEL - NIGHT
Brad comes out and motions to the ladies, who are waiting in
the car. They get out and follow him to room 114.
INT. MOTEL - NIGHT
In Joe's room, he is just coming out of it when there is a
knock on the door. He move uneasily to answer.
Joe, of course, appears to be the bellboy - so that when he
opens the door to find Brad, Helen and Amy, they think he is
George.
Instinctively, Brad (as George) tackles Joe (as bellboy),
dropping him to the floor inside the door.
Helen and Amy start hitting Joe with their purses, as Brad
continues to wrestle him on the floor.
Joe starts protesting his innocence.
JOE (AS BELLBOY)
It's me! It's Joe!
At first his protests go unheard, but he finally gets Brad's
attention.
JOE (AS BELLBOY)
George took my body! It's me, Joe.
Tricia's in trouble.
Brad, who has him pinned to the floor, looks up at the ladies.
HELEN
How do we know you're telling the
truth?
JOE (AS BELLBOY)
George is going after Tricia. She'll
think he's me. Look, if I was
George, or if I wanted to get away,
do you really think you could pin me
like this?
A look of realization crosses Brad's face. He relieves his
grip and gets to his feet.
BRAD (AS GEORGE)
He's right. George wouldn't have let
me do that.
Joe gets off the floor.
JOE (AS BELLBOY)
We've got to find Tricia.
INT. SUSAN'S CAR - DAY
Susan is driving, Tricia is seated beside her.
TRICIA
I hope I'm doing the right thing.
SUSAN
Of course you are. Trish, you don't
even know what . . .?
TRICIA
I know.
EXT. WOMEN'S CLINIC - DAY
Susan's car pulls into the parking lot at a women's clinic.
Outside a small GROUP OF PROTESTORS carry placards against
abortion.
INT. SUSAN'S CAR - DAY
Tricia sees the picket line.
TRICIA
Oh great . . .
SUSAN
Don't let them bother you.
EXT. WOMEN'S CLINIC - DAY
Susan parks the car. The women get out and start for a side
entrance into the clinic.
Some protestors start yelling at them.
PROTESTOR #1
Baby killers!
PROTESTOR #2
Murderers!
Tricia and Susan walk faster and enter the clinic.
INT. WOMEN'S CLINIC - DAY
Tricia moves quickly to the desk.
TRICIA
I have an appointment with Dr.
Kazajian.
INT. JOE'S APT - HALLWAY - DAY
George (as Joe) moves down the hallway to the door where
Joe's former apartment is. He looks around, then grabs the
doorknob. LIGHT appears around it and the door opens.
INT. JOE'S APT - DAY
George moves into the apartment. Tricia is still living
there when she is not staying with Susan.
He starts looking through the apartment, as if looking for
clues to something.
EXT. JOE'S APT - DAY
Susan's car pulls up in front of the building of Joe's
apartment.
INT. SUSAN'S CAR - DAY
Susan is dropping Tricia off.
SUSAN
You sure you don't want to stay at my
place?
TRICIA
I'm fine, really. I feel like being
alone.
SUSAN
Give me a call if you change your
mind.
Tricia leans forward and gives Susan a hug.
TRICIA
Thanks.
INT. JOE'S APT - DAY
The door opens and Tricia comes in.
She goes to the answering machine: no phone messages.
She goes to the kitchen and takes a pop out of the
refrigerator.
She moves from the kitchen to the bedroom, carrying the can
of pop.
She enters the bedroom - and stops dead in her tracks. She
sees Joe there, standing by the bureau, as if looking for
something. This, of course, is George (who now looks like
Joe). In the dialogue below, he is winging it.
TRICIA
Jesus, you scared me. What are you
doing here?
GEORGE (AS JOE)
I came here to see you.
TRICIA
I thought you were in a hurry to go
home.
GEORGE (AS JOE)
Well, I am. I want to take you with
me.
TRICIA
You what?
GEORGE (AS JOE)
You don't understand?
TRICIA
No, Joe, I don't understand. You
can't take me with you. I thought
you couldn't. I couldn't survive
your climate or something.
GEORGE (AS JOE)
I wouldn't take you if you couldn't
survive.
TRICIA
I don't understand this sudden change
of plans. I just-- . . . I just felt
like I did something to take control
of my life again, and now you throw
this at me. What the hell do you
want from me?
GEORGE (AS JOE)
I am wrong, and you are right.
TRICIA
What?
GEORGE (AS JOE)
Whatever we disagreed about. I am
wrong. I apologize. Will you
forgive me?
TRICIA
I don't understand this.
George is puzzled by the conversation so far and is not sure
how to respond. He measures his reply carefully.
GEORGE (AS JOE)
I love you. I want you to come with
me.
Tricia, beside herself, her mind going in a thousand
directions at once, gives in to her rawest emotion and moves
quickly into his arms.
TRICIA
Joe . . .
George stares off over her shoulder, more uncomfortable than
ever with a human woman in his arms.
EXT. AIRPORT - NIGHT
Joe (as bellboy), Brad (as George), Helen and Amy move into
the terminal after disembarking from a plane.
INT. JOE'S APT - BEDROOM - NIGHT
Tricia and George (as Joe) are in bed after a failed attempt
at lovemaking. The lamp on Tricia's side of the bed is on.
Silent tension fills the room.
GEORGE (AS JOE)
I assume I did something wrong. I'm
sorry.
TRICIA
It's okay. We've both been under a
lot of stress.
GEORGE (AS JOE)
Do you want to try again?
TRICIA
No. It's okay. Goodnight.
GEORGE (AS JOE)
Goodnight.
She reaches over and turns out the light.
In the darkness, George looks puzzled, tentative, not really
sure what is going on.
Tricia's eyes swell with tears, and she closes them, hoping
for rest.
INT. SUSAN'S APT - DAY
It is early morning. Susan, in her robe, answers the door.
Joe (as bellboy) moves quickly into the room, followed by
Brad (as George), Helen and Amy.
SUSAN
I beg your pardon.
JOE (AS BELLBOY)
Where's Trish?
SUSAN
Who the hell do you think you are?
She moves quickly toward a telephone near the entryway.
JOE (AS BELLBOY)
This is Joe. I think Trish is in
trouble. Have you seen her?
Susan stops and stares at "the bellboy."
SUSAN
How can you be Joe?
JOE (AS BELLBOY)
Trish told me about your affair with
your boss. She said that-- . . .
SUSAN
Okay! I dropped her off at home last
night.
JOE (AS BELLBOY)
I thought she was staying here.
SUSAN
She wanted to be alone.
Joe looks at the others. They know what they have to do.
INT. JOE'S APT - BEDROOM - DAY
Tricia wakes up in bed alone. She looks at the clock. 10
a.m. She bounds out of bed, grabbing a robe and hurrying out
of the bedroom.
INT. JOE'S APT - DAY
She comes into the living room, to find "Joe" (George) there
with one of her suitcases.
GEORGE (AS JOE)
I packed you a few things. You'll get a new
wardrobe after we arrive.
TRICIA
Joe, I didn't agree to go with you.
This is all happening too fast.
GEORGE (AS JOE)
I've already made arrangements for us
to be picked up. Get dressed.
TRICIA
I need time to think about this.
GEORGE (AS JOE)
We don't have time.
TRICIA
Then I'm not going.
George just looks at her with surprise, as if this obvious
response hadn't occurred to him.
GEORGE (AS JOE)
I'm sorry, but you have no choice.
TRICIA
What do you mean I have no choice?
Of course I do. Unless you plan on
kidnapping me.
GEORGE (AS JOE)
Thank you, I was unsure of the word.
Terror crosses Tricia's face. Now all her uncertainties
about the past day implode into a revelation: this is not Joe.
TRICIA
Who are you?
She is backing up away from him, scared out of her wits.
GEORGE (AS JOE)
It will be much easier if you
cooperate.
Tricia turns to flee and just as quickly George takes out the
small laser weapon and zaps her. She stands frozen in her
tracks.
He moves to her.
GEORGE (AS JOE)
I'm going to return part of your
active energy, just enough so you can
move. You're going to follow me and
do what I say. Is this clear?
George releases enough energy so Tricia manages to nod her
head, yes.
GEORGE (AS JOE)
Originally I was just going to kill
you and be done with it. Anything to
make him suffer. But maybe he'll
suffer more if you come with me and
become my significant sex object.
Fear streams out of Tricia's eyes but she is helpless to move.
EXT. JOE'S APT - DAY
George (as Joe) and Tricia, now dressed, come quickly out of
the apartment and into a waiting cab.
As soon as the cab moves down the street, Susan's car
arrives. Joe (as bellboy) gets out of the front seat and
hurries into the building.
INT. JOE'S APT - DAY
Joe rushes into the apartment.
JOE (AS BELLBOY)
Tricia!
He moves quickly through all the rooms. Nothing. He races
out again.
EXT. JOE'S APT - DAY
Joe rushes back outside.
JOE
Mr. Wells, have you seen Tricia?
DOORMAN
She and her boyfriend just left in a
cab.
Joe quickly gets back into the car. Mr. Wells watches with
a puzzled look. Who was this guy?
INT. SUSAN'S CAR - DAY
Susan is behind the wheel; Helen, Amy and Brad are in the
back seat.
JOE (AS BELLBOY)
He has her. They just left in a cab.
HELEN
What do we do now?
JOE (AS BELLBOY)
There's one place they may be going.
EXT. JOE'S APT - DAY
Susan's car takes off down the street.
EXT. CITY - STREET - DAY
The cab races down the city streets.
INT. TAXI - DAY
In the back seat sit George (as Joe) and Tricia, who still is
partially de-energized.
TRICIA
Why are you doing this?
GEORGE (AS JOE)
One double-cross deserves another -
I believe that's the way you people
put it.
TRICIA
I thought you were an advanced
people. Why do you mimic what we do?
An advanced people would have no need
for revenge. They wouldn't hurt
innocent people because they're
cowards.
GEORGE (AS JOE)
Cowards? I don't understand.
TRICIA
Taking it out on me rather than
confronting him directly.
GEORGE (AS JOE)
But he'll suffer more for you than
for himself.
TRICIA
Then you must be a very cruel people.
GEORGE (AS JOE)
Unfortunately, you won't have the
opportunity to find out. I’ve changed
my mind, my dear. I'm afraid
you’re going to slowly explode once
we get into space. You see, your
bodies are so different from ours, we
don't need the special kind of
pressurized protection that you need
to survive. You're going to blow up
and pop like a balloon.
TRICIA
Then you'll also be destroying one of
your own. I'm carrying his baby.
GEORGE (AS JOE)
That's impossible.
TRICIA
You can feel the life in me.
She is, of course, winging it - she'd had the abortion. She
takes his hand and puts in on her belly.
TRICIA
Feel the movement?
He falls for it.
GEORGE (AS JOE)
How extraordinary. I had no idea we
could breed with you.
TRICIA
There's no telling what kind of baby
I'll have until the birth. And now
there won't be a birth.
She turns away, giving him time to ponder this. The moment
is tense - will he go for the bait or not?
Finally he leans forward to speak to the driver.
GEORGE (AS JOE)
I want to go to the nearest hospital.
EXT. CITY - PARK - DAY
Susan's car pulls into a park located high above the city.
She parks and every one gets out.
SUSAN
What's here?
JOE (AS BELLBOY)
It's our rendezvous point. I thought
maybe he'd be taking her into space.
Maybe we're too late.
SUSAN
Why would he do that?
JOE (AS BELLBOY)
Because she couldn't survive without
special protection. He knows that I
know what would happen without it -
and how much I'd suffer for it. And
he's right.
Joe moves off, in visible pain. Helen and Amy look at Brad
for leadership.
BRAD (AS GEORGE)
I haven't a clue what to do.
Susan approaches Joe.
SUSAN
He'd take her into space, knowing she
would die up there?
JOE (AS BELLBOY)
Painfully so. It may already have
happened. Susan, we don't have the
same concept of love that you have
here, but I had learned to love her.
I loved her very much.
SUSAN
She loved you, too. Joe, I probably
shouldn't be telling you this - but
she was carrying your baby. She was
so thrilled - before everything
turned sour. That's how you should
remember her.
JOE (AS BELLBOY)
She told you she was carrying my baby?
Susan nods. Joe looks suddenly hopeful.
JOE (AS BELLBOY)
If she told him, then he wouldn't
kill her. He'd want to make sure it
was true. And if it was, he'd treat
her like a treasure. How would he
know it was true? He'd take her to
a hospital! Let's go.
SUSAN
Joe, yesterday Tricia-- . . .
But before she can tell him Tricia had an abortion, Joe is
racing to the car. Everyone piles in, and they are off with
a mission.
EXT. HOSPITAL - EMERGENCY AREA - DAY
The taxi pulls into the emergency entrance at a hospital and
Tricia and George (as Joe) get out.
INT. HOSPITAL - EMERGENCY AREA - DAY
George leads Tricia inside, holding tightly onto her arm. He
moves to a sign-in area.
GEORGE (AS JOE)
We have an emergency here.
Suddenly Tricia takes over.
TRICIA
I think I'm having a miscarriage.
GEORGE (AS JOE)
What?
Tricia starts moaning as if in great pain. The ploy works:
a nurse quickly comes to her, leading her toward an
examination area. An AIDE, a huge man, stops George from
following.
AIDE
I'm sorry, sir, you can't go back
there.
GEORGE (AS JOE)
But I'm--! I'm involved here.
AIDE
Are you the father, sir?
GEORGE (AS JOE)
Yes, that's exactly what I am. I'm
the father!
AIDE
Please take a seat.
George looks puzzled - what, short of zapping everyone, can
he do? He reluctantly takes a seat in the waiting area.
INT. EMERGENCY AREA - HALLWAY - DAY
As soon as Tricia and the nurse are out of sight of George,
her demeanor quickly changes.
TRICIA
I need you to call the police -
immediately!
NURSE
Ma'am? Are you still in pain?
TRICIA
I was faking it. I'm being kidnapped,
I need the police.
INT. EMERGENCY AREA - WAITING ROOM - DAY
George, unable to sit still, gets up and looks through the
door in the window to the hallway - and what he sees leads
him to quickly open the door and enter the restricted area.
INT. EMERGENCY AREA - HALLWAY - DAY
Tricia is still explaining to the nurse when she sees George
coming. She immediately turns and starts racing down the
hallway.
NURSE
Miss, you can't go that way!
George collides with the nurse, knocking her to the floor,
and hurries after Tricia.
INT. EMERGENCY AREA - THE CHASE
Tricia runs through a door and down another long hallway.
Just as she reaches the end of it, opening a door to enter
another section of the hospital, George (as Joe) appears down
the long hallway behind her.
Tricia now enters a hallway where visitors are strictly
forbidden. A doctor sees her and yells, "You there, stop!"
The doctor takes up the chase - and here comes George,
gaining ground.
Tricia reaches a T-junction and stops to look one way, then
the other, quickly making a choice and racing on.
George gets close enough to the doctor to be heard. The
doctor turns but George quickly zaps him with the laser
weapon.
Tricia is running out of breath. This won't do, she's sure
to tire and be caught.
So she turns into a doorway - right into the middle of
surgery.
INT. HOSPITAL - SURGERY ROOM - DAY
The startled staff at the operating table turn to look at
her. A SURGICAL ASSISTANT hurries to Tricia.
SURGICAL ASSISTANT
You must leave immediately--
TRICIA
You have to help me! He's from
another planet and he wants to turn
Earth into a zoo, and-- . . .
The surgical assistant has grabbed Tricia and is pulling her
toward the door. A NURSE comes to assist.
But adrenaline is powerful, and Tricia manages to break loose
long enough to dodge into a small adjacent supply room.
INT. HOSPITAL - SUPPLY ROOM - DAY
She slams the door behind her, then wheels over a cart,
trying to bar the door. The others start pushing on it.
It's a losing battle.
INT. HOSPITAL - HALLWAY OUTSIDE SURGERY ROOM - DAY
George (as Joe) races by the surgery room without stopping.
Tricia may be free and clear.
INT. HOSPITAL - SUPPLY ROOM - DAY
But the door is being forced open, as a crowd on the other
side is now pushing against Tricia and her cart.
In a final thrust and crash, Tricia and the cart go sprawling
and a crowd of staff members push into the room.
TRICIA
Please arrest me. Please take me to
the police.
EXT. HOSPITAL - EMERGENCY AREA - DAY
A police car is parked outside the emergency entrance, its
blue lights flashing.
Susan's car pulls up. Joe piles out, racing into the
hospital, quickly followed by Brad, Helen, Amy and Susan
herself.
INT. HOSPITAL - EMERGENCY AREA - DAY
Inside confusion is everywhere. A policeman is interviewing
a doctor. Another is interviewing a nurse.
Joe approaches an attendant.
JOE (AS BELLBOY)
What's going on?
HOSPITAL ATTENDANT
I don't think you belong here, sir.
Joe takes the hint and moves off, motioning for the others to
do the same. But as the others are going back outside, Joe
drifts behind - then, when no one is looking, darts through
a door.
INT. EMERGENCY AREA - HALLWAY - DAY
Joe enters the hallway, moving quickly if without a plan,
running on his hunch that Tricia is close to be found.
INT. HOSPITAL - CONFERENCE ROOM - DAY
In a conference room, Tricia is being interrogated by a
POLICE OFFICER and a DOCTOR.
POLICE OFFICER
You realize how hard is it for me to
believe you.
TRICIA
Yes, I do realize that. But I swear,
what I told you is the God's truth.
POLICE OFFICER
You want to ask anything, doctor?
DOCTOR
Yes.
He approaches Tricia with the guarded demeanor of someone
talking to a psychopath.
INT. EMERGENCY AREA - HALLWAY - DAY
Joe moves past the conference room and sees Tricia inside
through the window. He steps into the room.
INT. HOSPITAL - CONFERENCE ROOM - DAY
Joe's entrance interrupts the doctor's interrogation.
JOE (AS BELLBOY)
Tricia! I've been so worried about
you.
TRICIA
Joe?
Joe embraces her.
POLICE OFFICER
Are you this woman's husband, sir?
JOE (AS BELLBOY)
Yes, I am.
Tricia holds him tightly.
JOE (AS BELLBOY)
Has she told you what's going on?
TRICIA
They don't believe me.
JOE (AS BELLBOY)
I have something I want to show you.
We can see by Joe's expression that he is about to zap around
the room as energy again.
EXT. HOSPITAL - EMERGENCY AREA - DAY
Susan, Brad, Helen and Amy are waiting outside.
Around the corner of the building, George (as Joe)
approaches - and before he sees what is going on, he is
spotted by Susan.
SUSAN
Joe?
George turns and retreats behind the building.
HELEN
It can't be Joe - it must be the
other one.
AMY
I'm locking myself in the car.
Amy hurries to the car, followed by Helen.
BRAD (AS GEORGE)
What happened to Joe?
SUSAN
I need to find Tricia.
Susan boldly moves inside the hospital again, and Brad
follows eagerly, showing the excitement of a reporter on the
verge of the story of a career.
INT. EMERGENCY AREA - HALLWAY - DAY
Out of the conference room stride the police officer and
doctor, followed by Tricia and Joe (as bellboy) - their
serious demeanors tell us they now know what they are dealing
with.
POLICE OFFICER
I want you to restrict your people to
their immediate areas.
DOCTOR
Right away.
The doctor moves off.
POLICE OFFICER
You two come with me.
Tricia and Joe (as bellboy) follow the police officer down
the hallway.
INT. HOSPITAL - HALLWAY - DAY
Susan is moving down a hallway when suddenly George (as Joe)
darts forward and grabs her. Before she can scream, he has
zapped her into partial immobility with his laser weapon.
George has his hostage.
EXT. HOSPITAL - EMERGENCY AREA - DAY
The police officer is talking to Joe and Tricia just outside
the entryway. Meanwhile police have formed a line to keep
anyone else from getting too close to the building.
POLICE OFFICER
I have no choice but to let you do
what you think needs to be done.
JOE (AS BELLBOY)
That's right, you don't.
POLICE OFFICER
Good luck.
The police officer moves off.
TRICIA
Let me help.
JOE (AS BELLBOY)
You can't.
TRICIA
Yes, I can. Come with me.
She takes his hand and leads him back inside.
INT. EMERGENCY AREA - WAITING ROOM - DAY
They enter the waiting area, where the very large aide we saw
before works.
TRICIA
Give me his body. Then I can fight
as well as the next guy.
JOE (AS BELLBOY)
I think you're serious.
TRICIA
I am.
Joe studies her. Tricia's expression is serious indeed -
she's determined to play a part here.
INT. EMERGENCY AREA - HALLWAY - DAY
George (as Joe) is moving Susan down the long hallway.
As they move along, Joe (as bellboy) appears far down the way.
JOE (AS BELLBOY)
George! Give it up and go back to
Alpha.
GEORGE (AS JOE)
You and I have too much unfinished
business.
JOE (AS BELLBOY)
We can finish our business when we
get home.
GEORGE (AS JOE)
No, we'll finish it right now.
JOE (AS BELLBOY)
Then release the girl.
GEORGE (AS JOE)
I will when I know you and I are
alone.
George is moving slowly forward, keeping Susan close to him;
Joe is moving slowly forward as well.
George passes an open doorway and quick as a flash Tricia (as
aide) tumbles out like a huge boulder in an avalanche,
sprawling everyone onto the floor.
Tricia gets George in a bear hug on the floor. Susan, freed,
crawls away from the commotion, then gets to her feet.
Joe races forward.
George gropes for his laser weapon but Tricia's huge hands
twist it out of his grasp and now she has control of it.
JOE (AS BELLBOY)
Use the laser!
TRICIA
Not yet.
She maneuvers George under her and then sits on him, four-
hundred pounds of flesh squeezing the air out of him. George
gasps for breath.
JOE (AS BELLBOY)
Trish, use it!
TRICIA
So this is what it feels like to be
a hunk.
She is enjoying herself immensely, sitting on the squirming
George (as Joe) as he turns read in the face, his gasps more
and more urgent.
EXT. HOSPITAL - EMERGENCY AREA - DAY
An ambulance is parked outside the emergency area. George
(as bellboy again) is unconscious on a stretcher and lifted
into the ambulance.
Watching at the front of a crowd are Tricia, Joe as himself
again, Brad, Susan, Helen and Amy.
BRAD (AS GEORGE)
How do I get my body back?
JOE
Who has it?
BRAD (AS GEORGE)
The bellboy.
JOE
Come on, we'll give George his body
back, you'll get the bellboy's, then
you two can exchange later.
Joe leads Brad into the back of the ambulance before the door
closes.
SUSAN
How are you doing?
TRICIA
What a ride.
SUSAN
Enough for a lifetime for me.
TRICIA
I want him to take me with him.
SUSAN
I thought you'd explode in space.
TRICIA
He can put me in a pressure chamber.
Joe and Brad (as bellboy) reemerge from the ambulance, which
turns on its siren and moves off.
BRAD (AS BELLBOY)
Talk about having material for a
story!
INT. JOE'S APT - BEDROOM - NIGHT
Tricia and Joe are in bed, making love.
INT. BEDROOM - MORNING
The next morning Tricia awakes in an empty bed. She sits up
and looks around for Joe. She gets out of bed and puts on
some sweats, then moves out of the bedroom.
INT. JOE'S APT - DAY
Tricia moves through the apartment to the kitchen.
TRICIA
Joe? Honey?
In the kitchen she finds a note on the counter. Seeing it,
understanding what it may be, Tricia stops in her tracks.
Please, God, not again.
She picks up the note.
INSERT: THE NOTE
reads - "Be right back! Maybe before you even read this.
Love, Joe"
INT. JOE'S APT - DAY
Tricia lets go a sigh of relief. He hasn't left her.
She is making coffee when the doorbell rings.
Tricia bounds to the door, feeling full of energy - until she
finds Mr. Wells, the doorman, looking very official in his
uniform.
Once again Tricia jumps to conclusions, an expression of
worry flushing her face.
TRICIA
Something happened to Joe.
DOORMAN
Please come with me a minute.
TRICIA
What's the matter?
DOORMAN
Just come downstairs.
He starts down the hallway, and Tricia quickly follows.
TRICIA
Did something happen to Joe?
DOORMAN
Relax. Everything's fine.
INT. JOE'S APT - MAIN FLOOR - DAY
The elevator opens and Tricia follows the doorman out, moving
to the exit.
EXT. JOE'S APT - DAY
They come out of the building. And there, grinning at
Tricia, is Joe, dressed in the same doorman's uniform as Mr.
Wells. But this is the real Mr. Wells, grinning with new
youth in Joe's old body.
DOORMAN (AS JOE)
I'm young again! See what a gift
he's given me?
The doorman is modeling his youthful body, but Tricia has
turned to face "the doorman," who is Joe in the doorman's
body.
TRICIA
Why?
JOE (AS DOORMAN)
I hope I didn't make a mistake. You
said you wanted me to look that good
when I was old. Now I'm as old as
you have to become.
She is immediately in his arms.
TRICIA
But don't you have to go back?
JOE (AS DOORMAN)
I have another surprise: I contacted
my people and am here for the
duration. But we do have an
assignment together.
TRICIA
What's that?
JOE (AS DOORMAN)
To have a large family, so our
children can lead the way.
TRICIA
I love you so much.
They kiss - and their kiss is like a promise for a new day.
FADE OUT