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Ramanuja List Archive: Message 00042 Sep 2003

 
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sri:
adiyen's humble pranam to all devotees:

>Qs: By NC Nappinnai:====================
>Dear devotees,
> Humble pranAms to all. I have a question for which I need 
>clarification! It's regarding thirumaN. WHy don't females(both 
>married as well as unmarried) wear the perumAL's pAdam(white vertical 
>lines) and also the stem(kAmbu)? Are there any technical reasons for 
>it? I'm ashamed of myself b'coz my 5 year old niece had asked my 

General Answers will be Periyavas did it, so we do it, and that is acceptable 
to me, 
but to a 5 year old (in this day, age and place)the complete reason is needed.

The reason why we wear a Thiruman and what is signifies plays a part in this 
answer
so we have to delve into the reasonings as to why we wear Thiruman.(I will get 
into that in a later)

The Stem denotes Kainkariyam 
Kainkariyam is to do the service and do not expect or ask anything in return.
(This is why our sankalpams always say Bhagawath Kainkariya rupe
While Chanting Sri Vishnu Sahasranama we say, Bhagawath Kainkariye Rupe Sahasra 
nama Jape..)

You can explain this to the 5 yr old baby, by giving the example of Mom/ Child 
relationship
Mom does things for the baby out of pure love, she does not expect anything in 
return.
She bathes, feeds etc all purely out of love. Same way when a baby does 
something for 
mom, same bhava is in place. 
When this bhava is applied to doing service for LORD, we do not expect anything.
(Kainkariyam is not for our pleasure or HIS pleasure, it may be a by product, 
but that is not the AIM of the service)


Now the Kainkariya Sri for Lord Sriman Narayana is Adisesha 
(Proof: "Sendraal kudaiyam, irundaal singaasanamam..." - pasuram)

Swami Emberumanar (Ramanuja)is also considered as Adisesha Avathara, for that 
reason
and also that his sambhanda sambhadi (following his darsana)are assured moksha 
(by Thayar in Saranagathi gadya)
and many other reasons, the Stem after Ramanuja's time, started being 
associated with Acharya Kainkariyam.
Acharya for all of us is Swami Ramanuja. So even today when we serve our 
present Acharya, we serve him
as the Representative of Ramanuja to us. 

So the Stem for us denotes Acharya (Ramanuja)and kainkariyam. 
before Sri Ramanuja's time it just denoted Kainkariyam.

Little girls, when being born do not know which family they are going to be 
married to, how can they
know they are going to be married to a family that beleives in kainkariyam or 
how can they know who their
acharya wil be.

Boys on the other hand know their acharya from the time they are born 
(Upadesa RM: gyanam anushtanam ivai, nanrave udeyan - Ana Guruvai Adantharka
(This is a rare hidden jewel that has not been seen in many vyakhyanams except 
by sri PBA & Sri Perumbudur periya swami)
many other places it says .... to stay in the line of Ramanuja's established 
line.)

Women get the Acharya sambhandam via marraige to the suitable family, 
once the women is married, she gets to do kainkariyam that the family is doing 
(Husband is doing)
she does this through him. The husband gets to press the acharya's feet, fan 
for him, and serve him directly, but the
wife serves with / via the husband. (This is the traditional way)
Even if she cooks food or makes garlands, the man had to decorate the garland 
on perumal, 
he has to do Amuthusaiyyuthal or Kandaruala (offerring of food to perumal to 
make it prasadam)

Also women have certain Theettu periods.
This is not the time for doing kainkariyams for others, time to recoup energy 
for herself, so later she can do 
the needed kainkariyams with the family for the Lord, Acharya & other Adiyars.

In certain other sampradayas, ISCON, the lady can choose her kainkariyam and 
acharya and 
is not so much dependent on Husband for service, in their case the Stem is 
available on 
Man & women alike. (Women also have the stem in ISCON sampradaya)

Kainkairyam for Lord can be done anytime, anyplace by anyone. (As HE can bypass 
rules for LOVE)
But acharyas have to stay within the Rules HE has created.
In Sri Vaishnava Sampradaya, Acharya Kainkariyam for ladies is through the 
family,
they do not usually go and stay at Acharya Thirumaligai and do service to 
Acharya and his family
without the husband. (In todays age there are exceptions, especially if the 
husband has no time, 
is a non-beleiver or is not into kainkariyam etc.)

I hope this has given you some answers to give to the child, 



Azhvar Emberumanar Jeeyar ThiruvadigalE sharanam

adiyEn rAmAnuja dAsan 
Mukundan Vangkipuram Pattangi 






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