Subject: [[email-masked]: Nerd Test-- yet another]

From: [email-masked] (Andre' DeHon)
Date: Mon, 10 Sep 90 16:28:14 edt

Gee, see what happens when the net gets a hand on the East Campus
Nerd Test....

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Date: Mon, 10 Sep 90 15:35:42 CDT
From: [email-masked]
Subject: Nerd Test-- yet another
To: [email-masked], [email-masked],
        [email-masked], [email-masked], [email-masked],
        [email-masked], [email-masked]

                  *** NERDITY TEST, SQUID VERSION ***
                   --- All technicalities count! ---

          # sampled: 44  mean: 58.39  std: 14.99  range: 25-84

SELF-GRATIFICATION

1.  Have you ever seen an hp?
2.  Touched an hp?
3.  Owned an hp?
4.  Fondled an hp?
5.  Pushed the hp's button?
6.  Have you ever done homework that's not yours?
7.  Done homework over the phone?
8.  Read or bought any explicit mathematical materials?
9.  Read or bought technical journals (for the pictures, not the articles)?

KNOW THYSELF

10.  Can you read faster than 2400 baud? (extra point if over 9600 baud)
11.  Have you ever worn a pocket protector?
12.  Have you ever examined a log table?
13.  Touched a log table?
14.  Thought about it's design and possible function?
15.  Manipulated trig identities?
16.  Experienced Galilean transformation?
17.  Experienced Lorentzian transformation?
18.  Do you speak/use more than 5 languages? (Computer languages count)
19.  Done mathematical induction?
20.  Do you have a floppy disk?
21.  A hard disk?
22.  A flying disc (frisbee)?
23.  Have you ever experimented with more than one thermodynamic
     law in the same day?
24.  Have you ever integrated by parts?
25.  Used the right-hand-rule?
26.  Been motivated by quest for knowledge?
27.  Been motivated by quest for money?
28.  Experienced an E-field and a B-field?
29.  Never scored below average in a test?
30.  Do you wear glasses?  (contacts and sun glasses do not count)
31.  Have you ever integrated in a teacher's presence?
32.  Changed your major because of a class.
33.  Been forced to do RPN by a member of the opposite sex?
34.  Enjoyed it so much you considered quitting school?
35.  Fantasized about a non-linear least-squares-fit?

SKILLS OF WHICH WE DO NOT KNOW

36.  Have you ever integrated an equation with discontinuities?
39.  Integrated to success?
40.  Integrated to excess?
41.  Used a CRC?
42.  Used a CRC within the last week?
43.  Used a CRC more than 5 times in one night or one continuous sitting?
44.  Used frictionless surfaces, massless strings or pulleys for other
     than their specified purpose?
46.  Skipped class for the sole purpose of studying?
47.  Completed homework at least one week in advance?
48.  Used a harmonic oscillator?
49.  Found its period?
50.  Blown your own glassware?
51.  Never used an ammeter in parallel or a voltmeter in series?
52.  High scored a test?

NERD BONDING

54.  Have you ever tasted a solution?
55.  Tasted a supersaturated solution?
56.  Tasted your friend's supersaturated solution?
57.  Tried titration?
58.  Titrated in a public place?
59.  Titrated your friend's solution?
60.  Missed the equivalence point?
61.  Written up the experiment?
62.  Faked the results?
63.  Talked about binomial expansion to a person of the opposite sex?
64.  Attended a seminar?
65.  Enjoyed it?
66.  Have you graded?
70.  Have you memorized Newton's Laws.
71.  Have you ever put an object in motion?
72.  Did it stay in motion?
73.  Have you ever been attracted to a large body?
74.  Used physics as a pick-up, get-to-know-better routine on someone.
75.  Done homework in a group greater than 10 people?
76.  Have you experienced acceleration ( F over m )?
77.  Known a person who was admittedly into AC/DC (Analog
     Conversion / Digital Conversion)?

SKILLS OF WHICH WE DO NOT WANT TO KNOW

78.  Have you ever gotten DE's from a friend?
79.  Done P-Chem after 2am?
80.  Never done a re-do/re-write?
81.  Taken the nerdity test more than 5 times?
82.  Lied on the nerdity test?
83.  Given someone else a nerdity point?
84.  Been mathematically motivated?
85.  Exaggerated about any mathematical event?  (kludging on math
     homework counts)
86.  Graphed a saddle point?
87.  Graphed a monkey seat?
88.  Engaged in Fourier with the intension of differentiating?

KINKY STUFF

91.  Double majored?  (or even thought about it)
92.  Pulled more than 3 consecutive all-nighters?
93.  Been in lab for more than 5 hours straight?
94.  Differentiated by definition for more than 1 year .
95.  Differentiated with the chain rule?
96.  Been into E & M?
97.  Chemical bondage?
98.  Rigorous mathematical proofs?
100. Purposely scheduled a Friday lab?

----- END OF TEST ----

____CALCULATE YOUR OWN SCORE____NO CHEATING!

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