Invitation to Improve a New Bible Version

[Devenios Doulenios]

INVITATION TO IMPROVE A NEW BIBLE TRANSLATION

χαιρετε, φιλοι!

if you’ve ever wanted to offer input on improving a Bible translation, here’s your chance. I am posting draft copies of my translation of the Gospel of John on my blog, chapter by chapter, seeking comments, particularly comments to help improve it. This would apply to both the translation text and to the notes, as well the ancillary materials such as the Glossary. If you might be interested, here are some FYI matters to consider.

1) The translation is in English. 2) The intended audience is to be as broad as possible, including both seasoned Christians, interested laymen and scholars, as well as people who have never read the Bible. Therefore, I am striving to make the translation as clear as possible, using current, natural English: an idiomatic translation. This means that I avoid traditional theological terms that might be difficult to understand. I replace these with natural English equivalents. For instance, I would use “set apart/dedicate/make holy” for αγιαζω (hagiazo) instead of “sanctify”. 3) I am an American, but am striving to use English that is comprehensible internationally. In line with seeking to appeal to an international readership, weights and measures in the Bible text are rendered in metric units, with English standard units used in America in the notes. 4) Notes given provide Bible references, alternate translations, cultural and historical background, theological concepts, manuscript readings and variants, and discussion of translation difficulties and solutions. Terms from Greek, Hebrew, and Aramaic are given both in appropriate Biblical language fonts and in transliteration. 5) Greek grammar terms which are used in the notes, as well as other frequently occurring terms used in the notes, are typically abbreviated. There is an Abbreviation List for these. Often these will have a Glossary entry, which should be consulted, as well. 6) The translation of John is the first portion to appear of the work, which I am calling The Ancient Voices Bible: Dewayne Dulaney Version. 7) I am working from the best critical texts, the NA editions, UBS text, and SBL text. While I am always open to considering a reading from the TR/Majority Text tradition, generally speaking I favor the NA/UBS tradition. I have at times differed from the reading adopted in the text of these when I thought it proper. 8) Most importantly, I am translating and exegeting from a Christian perspective, offering the work as a means to Christian devotion and discipleship and as a tool for evangelism. I am seeking to be true to the vision of the original authors, and not impose any personal views.

The work is at the second draft stage. To access it, go to my blog, Let Ancient Voices Speak, and look for My Bible Version in the Categories list. Or type in “DDV” or “Dewayne Dulaney Version”, or “Ancient Voices Bible” in the search box. To share your feedback, you can either leave a comment on the blog (at the end of a post, or on the Contact page), or send a PM here. I look forward to hearing from you. I encourage you to read the Translator’s Preface first.

[Devenios Doulenios]

Now at a later stage of the project ( I just posted chapter 15 of John the other day), I am calling again for comment/feedback on my Bible version, the DDV. Here is what I just posted about it on Textkit:

I'm in the process of revising my translation from the Greek of the Gospel of John. I would welcome feedback, both on the accuracy of the translation and also on other factors. Things such as how readable is it, do the sentences flow naturally. Also, how useful are the notes.

I've posted a draft of chapter 1 with notes on my Academia.edu account. If you'd like to comment and help with this, here is the link:

https://www.academia.edu/s/2b4a7c24ac?source=link

Even if you can't speak to the accuracy re the Greek, your input can still be valuable. If you participate, I encourage you to read my translator's preface, also available on Academia.edu.

Dewayne Dulaney

[Jason Hare]

I like that you included a plethora (πληθώρα) of notes to explain your thinking. Just looking at the second note, I think you would expect someone to sort of oppose the translation of πρός + acc. as “face to face with.” That’s clearly too literal. It isn’t about which direction someone is facing. It is about where the Logos was located. It wasn’t on earth. It wasn’t under the earth. It was in the abode of God, where God dwells (πρὸς τὸν θεόν). Just as Jesus is said to have told the owner of the upper room πρὸς σὲ ποιῶ τὸ πάσχα μετὰ τῶν μαθητῶν μου (Matt. 26:18). It should be clear that πρὸς σέ means “at your house” or “where you dwell.” This is the same structure, using a verb that indicates no motion, speech, etc. together with πρός + acc.

Essentially, it is telling us that the Logos existed in the spiritual realm, the place where God dwells, perhaps “heaven.” In the beginning was the Logos, and the Logos was where God dwells (“with God”), etc. It doesn’t say that they were “face to face” or “looking in each other’s eyes” any more than Jesus intended to celebrate the Passover “looking in the eyes” of his host. That’s kinda creepy... and it isn’t what the language literally means, in contrast to what the statement in the footnote seems to imply.

[Just looking at the third part of verse 1, I tend to relate to θεός as “divine being,” which allows me to distinguish between “the Divine Being” (speaking of the Father) and “a divine being,” which I take as a better understanding of θεός here: ... and the Logos was with the Divine One, and the Logos was a divine one. That is, it wasn’t human. It wasn’t an animal. It wasn’t a demon. It was in the same category as God (and perhaps of angels). Do you imagine it possible that the gospel writer conceived of the Logos as an angel, perhaps as the highest angel in heaven? Philo of Alexandria wrote of “the Divine Logos” (ὁ θεῖος λόγος) that it was God’s firstborn (ὁ πρωτόγονος αὐτοῦ) and the high priest of the heavenly temple (cf. On Dreams I.125).]

[Devenios Doulenios]

Jason, many thanks for your feedback. You have the honor of being the first to give feedback publicly. You've raised some insightful questions. I'll respond at greater length in another post. Do you think "at home with" fits better as a translation of προς + acc. in this context?

Changes of this sort to the text and notes will be done after I finish the current draft of the remaining chapters of John, hopefully by summer or early fall this year. I am keeping a list of them.

[Jason Hare]

Jason, many thanks for your feedback. You have the honor of being the first to give feedback publicly. You've raised some insightful questions. I'll respond at greater length in another post. Do you think "at home with" fits better as a translation of προς + acc. in this context?

Changes of this sort to the text and notes will be done after I finish the current draft of the remaining chapters of John, hopefully by summer or early fall this year. I am keeping a list of them.

“At home with” presents its own difficulties when considered in colloquial English. It often means “is comfortable with” (“I feel at home with Java.”), and when speaking of an actual location I would take it to mean that you lived together with someone. “Where are you?” “I’m at home with my wife.” It would mean that it’s your home and your wife’s home, and you are there together.

In contrast to this, it seems that the author is taking what we know or believe (where God dwells) and relating the Logos to that place. It isn’t saying that it was the Logos’s dwelling place per se, but that it is the dwelling place of God—and the Logos was there. The Logos was with God where God dwells. Does that make sense? I take it as the same as the modern Hebrew preposition אֵצֶל (as opposed to how this word is used to mean something like עַל־יַד in the post-exilic biblical books) or German bei.

[Devenios Doulenios]

Perhaps "was with God in his [i.e., God's] home", or "was with God where God dwells" (or, "was with God where he dwells") would work. Besides conveying the thought accurately, I am trying to avoid phrasing that sounds awkward or unnatural in English. The translation is intended for all sorts of readers, including those who are unfamiliar with the Bible, and those for whom English is a second or third language.